Be Creative with JodyB

Sand, Caramel, Chocolate Ice Cream and Root Beer

2012-01-26T13:27:00.000-06:00

My son has noticed the differences in skin color among people. I guess 7 is a ripe age to ask your first question about color, but it has never come up before, and I hope that I said all the right things when it finally did.

Ryan was telling me about a girl on his bus who gave him a coloring picture because she had several and did not need all of them. He told me her name, and felt it was important to add a description: "The small brown girl who is also in first grade."From this I gathered the obvious... she is smaller than Ryan, and brown... but I already knew who he was talking about without the explanation.

So... with a little pinch of uneasiness in my gut and the mental reminder that this was one lesson I needed to get absolutely right we talked more about skin.We started with ourselves. What color were we? (I am sand, and Ryan is caramel by the way) and the little girl on the bus...she is brown. We talked about people that we know who are a darker shade of brown than the girl from the bus and people in the middle. Briefly... we came up with some interesting descriptives... that girl is now somewhere between chocolate ice cream and root beer. I wonder which one she likes better?

To bring Ryan's brain back down to earth though... we needed to talk about all the ways he is exactly like that girl. All the traits they share. They both have faces, and mouths that are normally in a smile. They both have eyes, noses, teeth, loose teeth, ears, hair, arms, legs, and thanks to Ryan... I now know that he and bus girl both have small and large intestines and a heart that pumps blood all around especially to their big, juicy, gray brains. They both have feelings, and ideas and toys that they love. Games they like to play and songs they like to sing. They are both in first grade, and they live in the same kind of house in the same neighborhood and ride the same bus. They are both humans, and they are both smart. Apparently though...Ryan says she is a girl and that he is a boy...who knew! We then talked about people we know who are different in other ways... A friend's dad who lost an eye, another friend who lost an arm and a man we have seen who has no legs. Different, but still very much the same as we are.

I told Ryan that February was Black History Month. That during next month, he would likely learn about a lot of different people and notice that they too were all shades and colors...but that one thing would always be true about each and every one of them.... They were just like him in hundreds of ways.

Even though I wish that we truly could live in a color blind world...it is clear to me that children inherently notice the differences between them and others. To teach a child equality, it is impossible to overlook the obvious differences and I find that hard... I hope I have done well...giving him a good foundation and if someone (a peer, a friend, anyone) ruins his innocence in this... I will be sad.

We Play to Learn

2012-01-26T13:05:00.001-06:00

Babies and toddlers learn at am alarming rate. Every single day, no matter their developmental level they will do something or say something to absolutely surprise their parents and bring great joy to their hearts. I see it every single day with Annalee... how she no longer calls her peers "kids" anymore, preferring the ten cent word "children" instead. "Mommy, there are two children in this seat! That is funny."

Yes Banana, but referring to yourself and your brother as "children" instead of "kids" was funnier yet.

So how do kids learn? Well... most of it is environmental. If you use "big" words instead of "baby speak" from the get go, speak to your children where they can hear you clearly and see your face, and you child does not have a delay or apraxia...I can guarantee you will notice earlier, more effective, proper speech.

We lead by example. We might not always be the ideal example...but no matter what, you babies are going to emulate you. If you vacuum a lot (like I apparently do) your kids are going to try to vacuum a lot. If cooking is your passion; your child is going to be at the stove trying to help. I have never met a preschooler who did not like to play house, cook, vacuum, play on the computer, pretend to drive, and so on... our everyday mundane tasks are the free-play dreams of our children.

Preparing your own children for their formal education is part of the parenting process, and absolutely your job. You could sit with your preschooler all day and work Kindergarten level information into their heads for 6 or 8 hours at a time... If that is what works for you then I cannot judge it, but it is definitely not what has worked around here. I do not advocate "doing nothing" either... as ignoring your children and leaving them to their own devices every single day is not a good idea. What I like is a whole lot of free, imagination driven play time with lessons mixed in that the kids do not even realize that they are learning.

Today Annalee has been a teacher, instructing me and some Squinkies in a new, beyond my skill level space-alien math and geometry lesson with her chalk and fabric chalk board. Annalee has been a mermaid during her second bath of the day (do not ask) and while doing so she learned the difference between a few marine mammals and fish. Sharks are NOT like whales. Do you know why? She now does. She then decided that she was definitely a mammal too. Can't disagree there! Currently, she is a hair dresser, for ponies...and as they sit at her station (a cute little vanity and stool, complete with mirror and drawer for all the goodies) she is signing to them, and telling them to sit still and that it DOES NOT HURT.

She is smart, she is learning, and even better yet...she is using her imagination, critical thinking skills to solve problems, and having fun.

Busity Bus Bus Bus

2012-01-17T08:17:00.000-06:00

For those of you following the bus story... This morning went smoothly.

I drove Ryan, and a few neighbor kids (and a bedheaded cranky Annalee wearing half of her pajamas and a blanket) down to the stop at 7am and we waited in the car until we figured out the best place to have the kids stand. I did not want to anger any property owners or leave them in the street! It was pitch dark when we arrived, but was not too dark close to pick up time.

I was very embarrassed that THREE sheriff's dept. patrol cars (all with two officers each) were there to watch. I am not sure who expected needing sheriffs, but that made me sad. If ANYONE was thinking about stopping the bus or something...they really need to know that is a crime punishable by a $500 fine and that I think they are ridiculous for even having that thought.

There were a LOT of kids missing. I assume that their parents took them to school today. I feel like that is a waste, because the whole point of this double route is to help with our VERY overcrowded bus... and today, with all the kids missing there did not need to be a second route at all! If these parents are going to take their kids every day from now on, Rice is wasting a LOT of fuel coming out here twice and we should not be forcing them to do that!!!! If you need to utilize the bus, PLEASE do so that this is not in vain!

Anyhow... The first bus came a little early (7:08) and was leaving by 7:10 but there were still kids coming up the street for the 7:15 pick up. I have to say a BIG thank you to our RISD police officer who was posted there to help out with the confusion, and for stopping the bus to make sure they got all the kids.

The same bus returned for the second pick up. It was the largest group, and it seemed to go very smoothly as well!

My biggest concerns at this time after our first morning with the new route are this:

There was a lot of thru-traffic at the corner as expected, especially while the bus was waiting for the kids running down the street at 7:10.

All of the elementary boys (oh, MINE included... we really do have a lot of BOYS out here) on one corner... were distracted and playing and having a great time...and NOT watching for cars or the bus! Ryan and I will have another discussion about this when he comes home... he has to be alert and safe.

Did the kids get there in time for breakfast?

How will drop off go? I already have two extra small ones to watch during drop off until the older siblings are delivered. I guess I will be a prominent figure at the bus stop, as the volunteer safety lady :-) and I do not mind... because there are at least two youngsters who need to wait for their older siblings to get there with the house key before they proceed home. Parents... if you are in this situation please let me know and I will be happy to stay at the stop with your younger ones while they wait.

So, not too bad. I still don't like it. Tomorrow will be much colder...so it could be interesting too...but so far so good Circle T. Nobody died.

unmotivated

2012-01-15T21:39:00.001-06:00

I HAVE PAINTERS BLOCK... and it is killing me.

I do not know why, but I have four things that I NEEEEEED to paint like RIGHT NOW and I just keep putting it off. I am having motivational issues and need a kick in the rear to get myself into gear. December did it, with the unexpected death of Karl's dad and the subsequent trip to Arizona...from that moment, when I learned of his passing...my craft-business centered mind spiraled out of control and I have not been able to get it back...
Someone tell me, what can I do to fix this?!?!

Shaving your legs...

2012-01-05T12:53:00.004-06:00

In the past week I have had two friends, both mothers of toddlers, complain about not being able to get their legs shaved because the toddler has decided to give up their nap, or they are just too busy in the "down time" to get personal maintenance stuff done...

In the guise of being helpful, I vowed to shave my legs today... in the MIDDLE of the day... during my toddler's play hours, and then tell them how I did it.

I remember being too tired to shave, or too lazy to shave, but I just do not remember not having that five minutes at all, even when I had a preschooler and a newborn.

So, for your reading pleasure... how I shaved my legs today with my toddler under foot.

First, you will need some supplies.

1. One industrial size can of Dollar Tree shaving cream. No worries if it is not your brand or style...just bear with me!
2. tempera paint or finger paints.
3. 60 minutes. I know I said five minutes, but to prep this out correctly, you may need the first fifty minutes to get all your cards lined up first.

I started off by setting up a painting activity with my basket of washable kid friendly paints. Brushes, hands, hair... all fair game. Paint to your heart's content little toddler! Which coincidentally, was about 20 minutes before she lost interest!

Then, I said... oh my goodness..you have paint up to your ears. We better find a fun way to get it off!

My toddler loves a good traditional bath. Bubbles are not even required... but for some of you, bath time is a chore. This is where that Dollar Tree shaving cream comes in. Have you ever seen a toddler that does not want to play in a tub coated in shaving cream? Me neither! Ideally, your toddler will watch you spray the tub bottom and sides with a nice coat of fluffy, FUN, shaving cream.

Strip your toddler and put them in... while you SHAVE YOUR LEGS! If you have a separate shower stall adjacent to your tub this is even easier...but it is not required.

I got my legs (yes, BOTH of them) shaved, in addition to both underarms AND got myself rinsed off before the girl was even showing a bit of boredom with her fluffy white bubble playground... there was no water in her tub to be dangerous, she was contained and she was having fun... I was within reach the entire time, and perfectly prepared to abandon my shaving to take care of her... but I did not need to.

When I was done, I just had to rinse the shaving cream off the kid and out of the tub... wash and condition her hair (completely optional) and we both were happy!

So, when you think your toddler's play and education schedule are cutting into your leg shaving time...it is just an excuse. You can TOTALLY find a way to do it...even if you waste a dollar worth of shaving cream in the process!!! Hairy mothers of multiple littles... how many kids can YOU fit in your bubble tub?

2011-12-30T23:54:00.000-06:00

What am I supposed to do when I have run out of things to blog about? Sure, I could rehash news stories, or give insight on things we have talked about 100 times before... but what do I do when I have LITERALLY run out of things to say?

Do I change the focus of my blog, when I already have a secondary one where I can write my rantings without censorship? Do I stop blogging altogether?

This is a serious issue, because the only thing I can think of to tell you, is that I have nothing left in me to write about.

What do YOU want?

Christmas Disappointment

2011-12-04T20:37:00.001-06:00

I have been married for ten Christmas seasons. In those ten years, I have looked forward to our local night time Christmas parade and the Community Park Christmas lights display every single year. Since I had children six Christmases ago, the anticipation and enjoyment of these holiday time events has increased many-fold.

In those ten years however, the quality of the Community Park display has waned consistently. Each year it just got crappier, sometimes with reason...and other times just out of pure laziness. Take for instance the year it iced horribly and the heavy ice pulled and ripped apart all of the big C9 lights in the giant oak and pecan trees...the loss of all those strands is explainable...

But why are there so many displays burned out and not replaced? Why does the length of the light trail shorten every year as the pull out bad sets and replace nothing? You cannot blame the lack of funding for the city because most of the displays are sponsored by local businesses in the first place. Is there just no one concerned enough about making the display nice or even memorable? Is there nobody soliciting donations for the upkeep of the displays or the addition of new ones?

I would sure like to know...because what once was a reason for my family to make many trips into town just to drive through the park, has become a "nah, it sucks. Lets go to Athens and PAY $20 to drive through some REAL lights!"

Corsicana: buck up and make it better or stop doing it at all, because right now it is a disappointment!

You call that service?

2011-11-26T16:51:00.001-06:00

I have experienced far more than my fair share of crappy restaurants or food service over the past month. Something has GOT to give... there is just no way that every single restaurant in the State Of Texas has gone to shiz. Our luck has just been bad, right?

We can begin with fast food because honestly... I know to expect very little from a drive through. I should also know better than to try to order with a coupon through the speaker box. I tried, diligently to order my free sandwich from the the coupon I peeled off of your cup... but YOU are the one that could not figure it out even when I read you the coupon code. Coming inside was probably the best way to start THAT venture... However when I am flustered and forget half my order I should be able to pull back through the drive through and expect some level of competence... When I say 4 tacos, I do not expect you to repeat "ok, that is a ultimate cheese burger combo" when I finalize the order.

Onto another drive through blunder... LARGE FRIES!?! Not large Sprite. Thanks.

Now... for the worst. A place where we could certainly be called "regulars." A place where my SON is greeted by waitstaff by an OLD nickname he received when he used to go to a babysitter daily... The parking lot was not full, yet we stood at the host podium for at least five minutes before the manager came to answer the phone. AFTER speaking on the phone, he finally put our name on a list (there is NEVER a list!) as well as the couple behind us and then walked away. I could see five empty tables from where I stood... in the meantime a couple of ladies came in who were never greeted or put on a list... but when the waitstaff walked by for the fiftieth time one finally stopped and prepared to seat the ladies who had just arrived, ignoring my family and the other couple... Unacceptable. We DID walk out, we DID tell you why. We have not come back either.

Steak house before football game? CERTAINLY. It sounded so good. Call ahead service? EVEN BETTER. I called ahead for a 5:45 arrival and was assured that as long as I checked in before 5:50 that we would only have to wait 10 minutes maximum for a table of 6. We checked in a 5:46 and were given our pager... Twenty minutes passed.

Wait... it gets better. A host-type girl came around with menus and asked if we would like to go ahead and order to "save fifteen minutes" once we were seated. It seemed like a good idea... to put our order in now because SURELY we would get that "ten minute" table at any second... so we made our selections and ten minutes later she was finally back to take them. She wrote them neatly on a nice pre-order card...and then HANDED THE ORDER TO US?!?!?! WTF is that going to do? We thought you were actually TAKING our order woman!

By the time we decided to give up.... we did not have time to wait somewhere else and had to eat Dairy Queen. Call ahead shmall ahead. Worthless.

Finally... and most recently, this was all in one place: If you take it upon yourself to bring an adult size cup to a child that is ordering from the kids menu...you charge for a CHILD drink. If your menu lists honey mustard or ranch dressing WITH a selection, you either make sure the kitchen plates the dressing, or you NOTICE it isn't there and ask if we need it. If you say sides can be substituted " with no problem" you do not forget to mention it is $1.35 extra. If you are unsure where that table is because a large party has combined tables...you find the server and ask...you do NOT go table to table and ask "did you order this?" and you CERTAINLY do not employ a guy with shiny ?greasy? Jersey Shore hair to ask me "hey there, how is everything? Good? Right oonnnnn."

Food service. It might not be the easiest job in the world but dammit, it is NOT the HARDEST.

Rainbow Turkeys

2011-11-11T09:38:00.002-06:00

Ryan is home from school today... the school prefers that you do not send a child to school who has run a fever or been physically ill within 24 hours...so lucky for him, even though he felt back to normal he got a free day. I believe in keeping our germs to ourselves if possible. I sure wish others did too.

We retrieved his work from school this morning, and dropped off his disguised turkey project that was due...and honestly I was expecting a little more school work to keep us busy during the day.

Since the homework took all of twenty minutes, I had to get creative... and decided a group turkey project was in order.

All moms have a drawer full of poster board scraps and multi-colored feathers right?

Turkey assembly was a hit...for about 20 minutes. These kids have skill! I could not even stretch the project out with "ok, time to let the glue dry." We seriously need a bigger, more time consuming project... The kids were in charge of the turkeys, and I was in charge of the sign. I think they are awesome in a multi-colored avante garde kind of way... Who said turkeys have to be orange and brown?

Now, I have a date in the living room floor...to play Squinkies. I hope another project comes to mind soon or this is going to be a nerve wracking day!

Etiquette and the modern girl

2011-11-03T11:45:00.001-05:00

A recent discussion about the infamous Kim Kardashian and her 72 day marriage has me thinking about societal rules of etiquette, and the politeness of the modern woman. It is arguable that Americans as a whole have nearly abandoned the many rules followed by previous generations, and that the evolution of society has changed the way we do business when it comes to gift etiquette. According to the "rules," a marriage lasting only 72 days requires the return of all unused gifts to those who gave them. I have found though, that opinion on this matter greatly varies in a progressive population of women across the country who believe in a varied scale of etiquette rules...or subscribe to none.

Certainly the rules of etiquette being lost for our future generations can only exacerbate the horrible condition that I like to call "entitled mentality." What once were humble and gracious gift recipients may have become a greedy and inconsiderate lot. What mothers have failed to teach their daughters, in plain defiance of their grandmothers instructions, just might have ruined us all. What you think of as an archaic practice of tedious banality really WAS a lesson in being a good person...whether you believe it or not.

So, let us examine a few pet peeves of mine relating to etiquette.

Gift giving instructions such as "The couple is registered at Macy's" printed right on a wedding invitation? NO! If you cannot spread the knowledge of a wedding registry by word of mouth to guests, the ONLY acceptable alternative is a separate printed card enclosed in the invitation.

A Money Train Reception? I do not know who came up with this practice, but it is T-A-C-K-Y. Not only are you telling your guests that you would rather have cash before a thoughtful gift, you are basically showing your ass by asking for it. If your invitation or enclosure card reads: "money train reception immediately following" I am NOT coming.

Inviting people you hardly know, or deciding between two people based on what kind of gift they might give? NASTY.

and finally... THANK YOU NOTES. They are not hard to write, and don't even have to be lengthy. Here is a sample that you can copy to your heart's content.

Dear__________,

Thank you so much for the ____________________. I really look forward to using it. I was so glad you could join us to celebrate our _______________, and look forward to seeing you again.
Sincerely,
XXX

You write thank you notes for bridal showers, baby showers, weddings, christenings/baptisms, graduations, bar/bat mitzvahs, quinceaneras, Sweet 16s, debuts, and graduations. No questions asked. Just do it, and do it promptly. Acknowledge the gift, and the joy you will get from it. EASY. If you feel like it is too much work, invite fewer people.

I am not going to be angry with a friend who does not follow the same rules as me. I am not going to be put off if you just never learned it....That is not your fault. but I am going to wonder about your Momma, and the etiquette or lack thereof might just affect my gift giving choices in the future. Sometimes, it is better to be backwards thinking or archaic. Sometimes, old school is the better school. Being a modern person does not have to mean abandoning the thought of being polite, humble and gracious in life.

P, and more P...Perfectly

2011-10-29T16:31:00.000-05:00

Today's Post is brought to you (however unintentionally) by the letter P. We had a fun outing today filled with Places and activities that begin with the letter P, and it was not until afterwards that I realized it... (Insert sarcastic remark about missed educational opportunity HERE)

First was the Pumpkin Patch

Followed by a Photo shoot in the Pocket Park

Immediately Proceeded by Play time in the Pond Park

and on the Playground

and Providing some food for ducks who love to Peck

If these ducks were named Percival, Petunia and Peter... I am Pretty sure it would be Perfect!

Losing my mind...or my children one at a time

2011-10-27T12:08:00.001-05:00

I panicked. It was about 7am and I could not find Annalee in our own home. I had already sent Ryan on the school bus and I was getting ready to do laundry when I decided to peek in on her...and she was not there. In those few seconds it took to walk from room to room to room that cool morning every possible scenario ran through my head.

Ok calm down, she likes to migrate at night into other beds, right? Check all the beds. Top bunk? No. Bottom Bunk? No. Her room full bed? No. Her room toddler bed? No. Did I miss her in MY bed? No. Holy crap! Couch? Floors? ANNALEE WHERE ARE YOU? Oh shit, Oh shit... check the beds again!

Walk to the bedrooms... don't think about the worst case scenarios. Oh hell, who am I kidding...worst case scenarios:
She had recently gotten really good at opening all the exterior doors...did she walk out of the house sometime in the night and get lost. Oh my God.
Did someone come into our house and snatch her. Oh my GOD. Where is she? Did she wake up and is she hiding. She does loves a good hiding game. Oh Annalee where are you?

Wait... what is that lump in my bed?

This child was not IN my bed for all proper purposes of the word. She was... INSIDE my bed. Silly Annalee had crawled into bed a little too sneakily that night. She had been all to intent on making sure she was warm too... because Annalee had crawled in between the memory foam and the fitted sheet...all the way to the middle of the left side, completely trapped between fitted sheet and foam mattress and sunk into it just enough that what should have been obvious was not...

There she was, sleeping soundly as I pulled the fitted sheet off her, and covered her back up with the quilt...

The heart palpitations subsided as quickly as they came... and I laid back down in bed, shaken. Annalee is going to need a GPS implant.

One year ago today...

2011-10-24T08:48:00.002-05:00

Just three hundred and sixty five days ago, I watched, from seven miles away, a tornado pass through the tiny town of Rice, TX . From my vantage point, my only certainty could be that it was there. I had no idea which part of town would be hit, or how bad it could be.

I prayed for my neighbors, who were probably all at home on a Sunday afternoon as destruction knocked on their door. I prayed for my home, because I wanted it to be there. I prayed for everything, because the previous day we had all evacuated our homes for storm shelters when we had clear warning...but that day was different and this storm felt like an unannounced visitor.

As soon as the charge in the air subsided, and a break in those storms was felt, I left my kids in the custody of my parents and their safer location and fled with my husband to survey the damage.

Our vulnerable country neighborhoods filled with trailer homes, wood frame farmhouses perched on pier and beam foundations, and homes that had withstood 100 years of time and storm were spared the greatest damage. The tornado had cut a path directly in between two trailer parks, sparing large numbers of houses most defenseless against that type of storm...

But we were not untouched. Ten homes across the countryside literally gone. Brick homes left in piles of rubble with a stairwell or a safe room the only protection for the families that resided there.

Our newborn Intermediate School... the one so brand new you could still smell the paint curing and the freshly planted landscaping taking root... took a direct hit. Train cars were thrown from the tracks onto our softball field and the football field was mangled.

A couple cars from the highway were either thrown, or covered with a load from a semi trailer.

BUT. We all survived. Even the family that took refuge underneath a building while their home was removed from it's foundation... SURVIVED. Rice crawled out of her hiding places in the minutes that followed and realized that through what could have been fatal, she had ridden and emerged thankful for the protection and favor that can never be guaranteed.

Soon, Tuscaloosa and Joplin easily eclipsed Rice in their battles against mother nature. Soon, tornadoes all across the midwest and south replaced our tiny town in the news, and the hearts of America. Their battles harder fought, and with far more loss became the new epicenters of severe weather.

Rice Intermediate was rebuilt. The siding and roofs of the homes that took the brunt of the baseball size hail and high winds were replaced. Trees cut down, and rubble cleared. Car windows replaced. Life returned to normal...

But Rice is not allowed to forget. There is a tiny piece of fear left to forever live in our hearts; a fear that reminds us that every storm is worth notice, that every weather alert holds merit. The adults who have survived more weather than imaginable have been reminded that mother nature is moody. The children who hunkered down for their first storm or watched it approach from their yards without knowledge of what was happening newly scarred. Rice survives today, one year later... but not without her battle scars.

It is just ruined...

2011-10-16T14:34:00.000-05:00

I think I really started noticing when I turned 27...but I am going to blame year XXX. That "magical number" that rips you right out of your late twenties and throws you into the dirty thirties is what did it. I am not saying 30 makes anyone old...

What I am saying though, is that my skin looks like CRAP and I have no idea what to do. Sun damage... freckles, sun spots, crap crap crap crap. ACNE? What the heck? I did not even have trouble with it in High School but I sure do have some freaky old lady acne now. Oily today, dry as shiz tomorrow. Patchy flakey spots, with a greasy forehead. I guess it has always been "combination skin" but holy crap... Blackheads? SHUT YO MOUTH. WHAT is that dark spot on my cheek? Who makes the rules here? I am a mother, I should NOT need a lengthy skincare regimen.

Bought some foundation. Hated it. Bought some more. Hate it too. Fine lines turn into cracks with mineral powder or liquid... I need some advice. Who am I supposed to ask? My mom?

I hate my skin. It is ruined and I have no idea if there is anything I can do to fix it. Besides...standing in the skincare aisle at the store is just about as close to torture as I want to get. TWENTY FIVE dollars for moisturizer? You must have me confused with someone who could afford a surgeon to fix this mess... Call my Arbonne rep friend? psht... I'd love to, but I can't afford her stuff either.

I am going to see about a skin transplant... I used to like my perpetually tan olive complexion. Now I am pretty certain that I got the poopy end of a stick...

Flies, gnats and mosquitoes oh my!

2011-10-05T14:42:00.001-05:00

We spent all of the hot, dry summer without a few pesky insects that are normally very prevalent in our neck of the woods. I have to tell you that I did not miss them. I did not miss the millions of grasshoppers that eat my plants, or the crickets that cover the sides of buildings at night. I REALLY did not miss getting dined upon by vampire mosquitoes, or buzzed by flies and gnats.

Today though... with a beautiful 87 degree day and an inch or so of rain from two weeks ago, and the BUGS HAVE RETURNED. Hatched from their dry, patient clutches...just waiting for temps and moisture to become more pleasant... The bugs have invaded.

I have a mosquito bite on my knee that itches to high heaven and the house is FULL of flies. It does not help that the lovely temperatures have led me to open up the house and turn off the A/C... or that to create a breeze I opened up the back door where there is no screen...

So, by self infliction... I am fly infested.

I just read about a natural fly trap involving a wine bottle and something sweet like fruit... that by putting fruit peels into an empty wine bottle you can trap the flies inside. Without an empty wine bottle in sight, I improvised with three empty plastic water bottles and sacrificed a slightly mushy strawberry with hopes that the flies would fly on in.

The verdict is still out on the fly trap, but I will let you know.

In the meantime, help a sister out. What are your favorite ways to keep the flies away, or catch them if you have them? Do share!!!!

Annalee tells a story...

2011-09-25T11:18:00.000-05:00

If I had to decide which of my children was more creative or better at imaginative play I would have to say Annalee. Ryan has always been far more concerned with concrete things, tangible toys and activities that involved realism. He can imagine with the best of them, it is just not the activity of preference in a Ryan-only world.

Annalee on the other hand is quite the pretender. She talks to her "guys" every night when she puts them to bed. She lines each of the up on the pillows and tucks them in like any good momma would, and then laughs when she asks herself... wait, where is MY spot? She cooks in a pretend kitchen, and has a dance show for imaginary people at least once a day... but my favorite imaginary Annalee activity is when she tells me a story.

It is hard to get her to do it, because in her own words she is "not very good at reading books," but if I encourage her enough I can get her to tell me one of the common nursery rhymes that I have been telling the kids for years. Three Little Pigs, Goldilocks...you know the list. The ones that you just don't need a book to recite.

When I do get her to tell ME a story though, I can expect for it to be an Annalee original adaptation. She just embellishes and changes it enough to suit her and it is incredible.

Yesterday I asked her to tell ME a story at naptime. We were on the couch, and I thought if she told me a story she might give in to the temptation of sleepy time. What happened though was a page right out of a funny-mom-story book, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Me: Please tell me a story Annalee.

A: I can't momma. You have to do it, I am not very good at reading books.

Me: But you can tell me a story from your memory. You don't have to read a book.

A: OK! There was a pig, he was very afraid of the big big big bad bad wolf. He built a house out of flowers. The big big big bad bad wolf came over and knocked on the door and told the pig to let him in. Piggy said no there is hair on my chinny chin chin. So the wolf, he is SCARY.. . said I'll puff, and I will puff, and I will puff, and I will BLOWWWW your house down. (blowing)

When the house blowed down, the piggy ran to the other house made of bricks. BIGGGGGG strong brick. You can't blow a house down with biiiiiig brick. Three pigs in the brick house were afraid of the wolf, but he could not blow it down with the hair on the chin so the pigs ate lunch and laughed at the big wolf because he could not get in.

I was almost asleep, thinking that my girl had conjured up a decent story. I was hoping she would sleep too, right up until I felt her put a piece of dry cereal in my ear and then whisper into it... "Momma, WAKE UP! It is not Momma nap time, it is YOUR turn for stories!"

So much for that nap!

EcoStore USA Review

2011-09-20T15:48:00.001-05:00

Recently I was approached by a representative of www.ecostoreusa.com to do a product review of two eco friendly, truly green, nasty* chemical free products from their line. I was on board since I am always interested in reducing toxins within my home while maintaining effectiveness of cleaning products and such. Eco Store USA is a branch of the 20 year old New Zealand based company of the same name.

While we all know that vinegar, baking soda, and a few other harmless kitchen products make fine, all natural home cleaning solutions, sometimes a more "aggressive" product can be needed for stubborn jobs. So the first product I chose was the Eco Store's plant based toilet cleaner. Toilets might just be the nastiest place in a home by nature, and cleaning them my least favorite job. Regularly available toilet cleaning products rank up there on chemicals and caustic nature too... so the opportunity to find a natural solution for this bathroom nightmare was intriguing.

For my second product, a "green" body soap sounded exciting. Coconut seemed promising, as it is one of my favorite body cleansing scents. So, Coconut bar soap it was.

The first thing I noticed during delivery, was the rather large packaging that my products came in. A cardboard box measuring 12" x 6" x 6" containing one regulation size plastic bottle of liquid toilet cleaner and a single bar of soap in a printed card-package arrived this afternoon. Neither the outer box, or soap packaging mentioned being made of post-consumer recycled paper products, and that was a disappointment. The HDPE plastic bottle for the toilet cleaner was a bummer too, but I realize that reliable and cost effective liquid packaging sort of requires petroleum based plastics. The box was filled with biodegradable/water soluble cornstarch packing peanuts...so they did get a point there!

A suggestion to the Eco Store: Use post-consumer recycled packaging when possible. Just knowing that the cardboard is maybe on its second life already makes it a little bit more "green."

In examination of both products I found the following things as interesting. The toilet cleaner is made in the USA, is plant based, and has just a few ingredients:
Water, Citric acid, Xanthan gum, Glucosides (from simple glucose), gluconic acid, and Pine oil.

The claims on the bottle: Plant based, earth safe and biodegradable from sustainable resources. No petrochemicals (except that nasty bottle!) phosphates, bleach, nitrates, ammonia, EDTA, chlorine, DEA/TEA, preservatives, or perfumes and dyes.

It smells like pine. Not horrible at all. It is clear, easy to apply, and effective. It polished the toilet bowl as expected, and left no caustic fumes in the bathroom. The toilet was clean, and I was happy.

After cleaning the toilet, the most natural step is washing your hands! That is exactly where I went with my Eco Store Coconut bar soap. It was an unoffensive white bar and smelled VERY slightly of coconut. The lather was not very sudsy but it felt effective in it's cleaning ability. I was slightly sad that the coconut scent was not stronger, and that it did not linger but the soap seemed gentle and clean. It claims safety for sensitive skin too!

The soap is a product of New Zealand and the box claims: No animal fats or tallow, petrochemicals, synthetic dyes, sodium lauryl sulfate, or propylene glycol. It lists the following ingredients: Sodium Palmate, Sodium Cocoate, Water, Fragance, Glycerine, Sodium Chloride, Coconut Strands, and Titanium Dioxide.

In conclusion, I think that www.ecostoreusa.com has a great opportunity here to cater to those of us who want to avoid "nasty" chemicals when cleaning and bathing. The toilet cleaner and bar soap products proved effective, useful and pleasant. Conversely, Their packaging left room for improvement in environmental friendliness and I urge the company to consider better options there.

Thank you www.ecostoreusa.com for this opportunity to try these products. I like them! Check them out friends, you might too! Eco Store Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ecostoreusa or Twitter: @ecostoreusa!

(Disclaimer: I was not monetarily compensated in any way for this product review. I was given these products free of charge, in exchange for my honest opinion regarding them. I have no affiliation with the aforementioned company, and provide this review as an honest account of my experience.)

Have I told you?

2011-09-12T16:56:00.000-05:00

I opened Ryan's take home folder last Thursday to find a note, stapled inside that was addressed:
Dear Mr. and Mrs. Bentz
YIKES! Talk about a twinge of fear before I began reading. It was only the second Thursday of the First Grade for Ryan, and I wondered if my prayers for brilliance and model behavior had gone unanswered.

I was pleasantly surprised.

Words like wonderful, perfect example, works hard, great helper, and thank you.... All the descriptors that a mother prays for. A beaming smile and deep praise for my son followed, and a heartfelt thank you to him for being as wonderful as he really is. I am constantly reminded that he is amazing. I am thankful for it.

My daughter... precocious and beautiful. Stubborn and smart. She makes me laugh every day with her incredible silliness, and makes me gasp with her rapidly growing intellect. I am equally proud of the amazing young lady she is growing into.

My youngest brother, excelling in his junior year of high school and on the football field. I just feel like he is destined for great things. A complete package of scholastic achievement and athletic prowess. Going places. Shaping his future.

Pride. I am filled with pride for these young people around me. Genuinely good kids, who are on the path to grow into wonderful, well rounded, accomplished adults. I can't wait to see what happens!!

We Remember 9/11

2011-09-08T06:00:00.000-05:00

Ten years ago, I was a newlywed college student. Back then, my television was my alarm clock, and classes and/or work were my only to-do's each day. On September 11, I remember that TV turning on as I slowly woke up. Diane Sawyer was reporting in front of a window focused on the WTC and she said that there had been a plane crash into one of the WTC Towers. At that point they were reporting that it was a small privately owned aircraft. I sat straight up in bed, and began to watch 9/11 unfold in front of me.

What I saw and heard next is burned into my psyche. The second plane hit the other tower. Diane Sawyer said a bad word. Confusion erupted. You could tell by the look on her face that she was getting instructions in her earpiece. She looked at the camera. She visibly shook. She said "They are saying that a second plane has now crashed...." It was as if someone turned the world upside down on top of me. "This cannot be coincidence. They are reporting now that this is not an accident and that these are hijacked commercial jetliners..." I began to cry. Diane kept looking over her shoulder toward WTC. They flashed to a shot from the ground, showing both towers appearing like giant smoke stacks... I was speechless and lost.

I had an appointment at a Government Office that morning to get my name changed on my Social Security card. I had been married just two month prior, and was still doing paperwork in relation to that. It seemed ridiculous at that moment, and a little scary not knowing what was going on but I got up, showered, and got ready for my day stopping several times to watch the reports.

Soon (and honestly, I cannot remember where I was at this point...in the car, in front of a TV...not sure) I heard that a third plane had flown deliberately into the Pentagon.

I got my Social Security card changed and remember nobody in that office seeming distraught or out of sorts while our world was falling apart. When I went outside, I made my first call. To my mom. We were equally emotional and confused. I asked her what I should do. She said go to class like normal.

I went to the college, and up to Biology. Campus was a mess. All available TV's were either tuned to a news report or were being hooked up by professors or students... My Bio professor tried to act normal by passing out some papers for our lab scheduled later that afternoon but then she stopped...walked into her office and pulled a TV cart out into the room. She said that class was effectively cancelled, but that we could stay there to watch and talk.

We watched for a bit, and the South Tower suddenly collapsed. Tears and grumbling indecipherable discussions everywhere. It suddenly occurred to me that I should be trying to think of anyone I know or love who could be in any of these buildings, on a plane, or otherwise in danger. I heard that WTC Dallas was evacuated because they just did not know what was happening. Someone reported that a fourth plane was SHOT DOWN by US Military in Pennsylvania. We gasped. I decided to leave.

I heard that a couple Muslim students had been harassed. I heard that Arab kids were trying to leave.

I made another call, this time to my newlywed husband. He was at work in Dallas, and I did not get through.

I went to my place of employment, which also happened to be where my mom worked too. I did not have any idea what I was doing and everything seemed to be on pause... but I knew that I did not want to be alone. We watched coverage all day. I remember spending hours convinced that fighter jets shot that plane down in Pennsylvania and I was upset by that thought. I remember my world... everyone in it... just being in standby mode. Nobody was really working, and clients were not really there for our services... we all just watched our safe little bubbles burst and our lives change forever.

I remember the days and weeks that followed. No air traffic at all when I was used to seeing commercial planes often. Patriotism and feelings of camaraderie with people you did not even know. Sadness as search and rescue at ground zero turned into recovery. Seeing the "falling man" images...somber portraits of the last moments of life for those trapped above the crashes, embracing their fate and choosing to jump instead of burn. I remember continued commotion regarding security, and safety. I remember it all.

September 11, 2001 haunts all of us in different ways today, ten years later. When Osama bin Laden was killed earlier this year, I found myself in the position of explaining 9/11 to my six year old son. I really did not even know where to start but I knew that he would never know the almost conceited American feeling of safety that we all knew before 9/11, or the tragedy that it was when we realized that we were never going to have it again. That our children now grow up in a world completely different.

That taking someone to the airport really means just dropping them off at the curb. That every time I go inside a building taller than 10 stories, I think about the WTC towers, and become immediately afraid of going up in the elevator. That an uncommonly powerful natural earthquake in New England immediately causes a moment of panic when anyone experiencing it asks themselves...is this an attack? A post 9/11 world is just different even ten years out, and I hope that our children never have a Pearl Harbor or a 9/11 to reflect upon as we all are doing today.

My experiences are not singular, and I am not alone in my reflection. I have asked many of my greatest friends to describe their own experiences on that fateful day. These are some of their stories.

Audra was in College too:
I was in music theory class in college. I was a sophomore and my friends were talking about it before my 9:00 class, then after my class we heard it was a terrorist attack. I just remember lying on the couch in Matt's dorm room that day, huddled together and glued to the news, and never wanting to leave that safe place again.

Amanda was in High School:

I was literally walking up the stairs in my high school when someone yelled "they just flew a plane into the WTC". The kid who did this was always playing jokes on people (like throwing one of the dead frogs from Bio. down those same stairs the year before), so I didn't really pay any attention to him. When I walked into my math class, it was on the TV and everyone just filed into their seats quietly while watching the TV. I'm not sure if I actually saw the 2nd plane hit or if it was a replay, but I remember the class being totally silent. No one talked.

We were let out of school early that day. My husband (boyfriend at the time) was older and out of school, so we met for lunch at McDonalds. He was supposed to be in Germany at the time, but the trip was cancelled a week earlier. We had lunch and talked about what happened. I remember being so thankful that he wasn’t on his trip.

The rest of the day was a blur for me. I remember going home and my dad was on the phone nonstop all night. He worked at the nuclear power plant that was less than 3 miles from our home. He was talking to people from the plant to make sure everything was secure. I was scared. I didn't fully understand what was going on. I remember going to bed that night and just crying. My dad tried to reassure me that nothing was going to happen to the plant, but I couldn't get it out of my mind. I thought for sure that I was going to go to bed and never wake up.

The next day when we went back to school, we didn't really have actual classes. Classes were spent talking about what happened the day before. People roamed the halls. I remember we changed for phys. ed. and were outside playing tennis when military helicopters circled above us. Everyone just stopped what they were doing and looked up. It was a very uneasy feeling.

I remember the sense of community and patriotism that followed. It was like nothing I had ever seen before in my 17 years. Those days and weeks that followed were very emotional. I remember crying a lot for those that lost their lives, the people that were still missing, and all of the families.

From Laura:

I was in class in 6th grade when it happened. Someone from the school brought a note to my teacher whose husband who was in a plane that very same day. My teacher let out a scream and just started crying.

We were very confused until someone (can't remember who) removed her from the classroom. They told us that there had been a terrorist attack and that they would play the news for us. We were asked please not to run around or be loud because anyone with family members in New York or D.C. would have access to a phone to make sure they were ok as long as they knew their number. It was the first time I thought that the principal was a kind person. I was a bit of a troublemaker so I only knew the his stern side....

I still cry when I think of that day because we lost that sense of safety. My parents came to this country because of it and now it felt like it wasn't there.

Natalie offers a Canadian perspective:
It was the second week of 7th grade at a brand new school that had just been built. Our teacher came back after lunch and told us what had happened. It meant nothing to me at the time - I had no concept of what the World Trade Centres were or what the magnitude of this was.

When I got home that afternoon my older brothers were glued to the TV and that's the first time I saw the images of what happened replay over and over. I finally made sense of what had been told to me earlier in the day, and I really couldn't believe that people were capable of hurting other people like that.
I remember one year later my teacher encouraged us not to watch the same clips be played over and over mindlessly but to really think about what was happening at that moment - thousands of people were losing their lives when those towers fell.

We prayed as a school the next morning, and the morning after that, and the morning after that.

I remember one year later my teacher encouraged us not to watch the same clips be played over and over mindlessly but to really think about what was happening at that moment - thousands of people were losing their lives when those towers fell.

Ali shares:

I remember being woken up by my phone ringing a few times - I was ignoring it as I was an unemployed recent college grad. I was actually going that day to do a drug test to start a new job. But being 22, I wanted to sleep in! So I grumbled out of bed and went to hop in the shower since whoever was so rudely calling me (my thoughts then!) and not leaving messages had me awake. I turned on the radio in the bathroom to listen to during my shower and was annoyed that it only seemed to be commercials or talking, so I turned on a CD - James Taylor.

I got out of the shower to the phone ringing yet again and answered it - it was my best friend, college roommate, calling to see if I'd seen th news. I said no, she said turn on my tv and call her back. I remember being so confused. I'm on the west coast, so by the time I was waking up, a lot had happened. People on the news were so frazzled, and I could not believe what I was seeing.

I remember calling my friend back. She was living with her parents in another state at the time, but was home alone, and we were both scared and alone, so we sat on the phone in silence, watching CNN together. It helped to not feel so alone. We sat on the phone for hours that day, saying very little, watching together in stunned horror.

I also remember calling the lab where I was to do my drug test that day - I knew some buildings downtown had closed, and I was stunned they were still open. I didn't want to be driving around downtown - or anywhere for that matter.

I also remember having to be on an airplane on Sept 11, 2002. My boss called and said he needed me to get to Ohio for the 12, but that he would not make me fly on the first anniversary of 9/11. He said I could go the day earlier if I wanted to, or just be late to the meetings on the 12. I felt ok about it, but it was really the only time as an adult that I asked my mom if it was ok - I didn't want her to worry about me .

No one who was aware of the events will ever forget what happened in the world, or in their world that day.

Elle experienced it from the West Coast:
Living on the west coast I think my perspective of what happened was a little different. In some ways it felt so very far away but at the same time this was happening in my country. I had just woken up and turned on MTV like I normally did to get ready for school. I was a junior in high school at the time. Instead of MTV however it was the news and they were talking about how the towers had been hit. I ran downstairs and told my mom to turn on the TV. My mom, sister, cousin and I sat in shock watching what happened. My mom was not sure whether she should send us to school or not since they were discussing major cities being the target of the attacks and we lived close to SF. I decided to go anyway. My English teacher at the time spent the whole day crying because her cousin worked in the WTC (he ended up being ok). I remember thinking that this couldn't possibly be happening. We lived in the US things like that didn't happen to us (obviously I was a naive 16 year old). I think I attended every 9/11 memorial they held in our area including a memory walk. It felt like it was the only thing I could do. Being surrounded by people who were just as shocked and confused as I was felt more normal. In spite of all the horror that we were seeing on tv I remember looking around and being proud of how people were coming together. American Flags everywhere, people were kinder to one another, everyone was proud to be an American and that was inspiring to me. I also remember the very real fear that my cousin and brother in law who were both in the military were going to be deployed to war. They both got called out in the first wave. It is definitely a day I will never forget.

Thank you to my friends for sharing their stories about September 11, 2001. In three days, we will all feel those twinges of pain and fear a little stronger as the Tenth Anniversary of the worst attack on US soil since Pearl Harbor reminds us that nothing is guaranteed. Each day is a gift, each hour is a lifetime. We can move on, we can live our days with flippancy or gratitude or a variation of both... but the fact remains that we will never forget.

Wildfires

2011-09-05T22:21:00.002-05:00

Yes, we do live in North Central Texas.
Yes, there are wildfires in our immediate area.
No, we have not been in the immediate path of any thus far.
No, we have not been evacuated, and of course we hope to keep it that way.
Yes, we are watching the situations carefully, and being extra cautious.
Yes, Texas is a big place, but the drought has left us very vulnerable across the entire state.
Yes, the current danger is "off the charts" for spontaneous wildfires.
Yes, we know people who are currently displaced, evacuated or have experienced damage.
Yes, firefighters are NEEDED! Whether you are active, retired, volunteer, etc. please call 512-978-1187 if you can help.
No, we do not know when the danger levels will decrease.
Yes, we have 100ft of water hose ready to go.
Yes, our firefighters are doing an incredible job attempting to protect homes and structures in the paths of these fires. They are also very tired and could use your prayers.

Thank you for asking!

2011-08-31T12:52:00.000-05:00

What in the world has been going on in JodyB land? Well... The new blog went live last week and I love it. Cathartic and therapeutic, it is. To be able to say exactly what I want without worrying about anybody caring. LOVE. Lots of naughty words going on over there :-)

I've been doing all of my "jobs" too. Cleaning seems to be the bane of my existence, followed closely by folding the laundry. I can wash and dry the laundry like a diva but actually getting it folded and put away.../ not my strong suit.

I have been adjusting to the second new schedule in just as many weeks. School started last Monday, and then Karl's other-other new schedule started this Monday so...a routine would be relaxing. We are getting there.

I have been preparing yummy meals... you know, the kind where the dinner table goes silent as soon as the meal has begun. You look around to see if they are asleep, and you realize the kids could not talk even if they wanted to because their mouths are chock full of whatever it is I prepared...Like this:

I have been worrying about friends. They know who they are. Hope it is all working itself out friends!

I have been alternating between proud parent, proud sister, proud wife, and proud daughter... I tell you what, sometimes the people around me all come together in a coup of awesomness that takes my breath away.

I have been mad at the City of Rice... you know, the dictators... Yeah, still fighting with them. I decided that my rants about that fight better served the other blog, so you can catch up on that there.

and I have been obsessing about October. It will start our Christmastime craft fair bustle...and I want it to be amazing. Problems have arisen in obtaining supplies... but I hope to have that worked out soon so that I can get busy.

So... tell me folks, what have YOU been up to?

Hide and Seek

2011-08-25T12:33:00.000-05:00

Annalee has been incredibly interested in playing Hide and Go Seek for months but most of the time she has played with Ryan and the neighborhood kids. Yesterday, with the bigger kids in school we had the opportunity to play together and it was hilarious.

At first, she hid in the same hallway closet every single time. She would crack the door just enough to watch me walking around pretending to not know she was in the closet, and then I would hear the giggles right before she jumped out to surprise me.

After a few lessons in the mastery of hiding places she got better. Showers, cabinets...the girl was on fire with places to hide...but the giggles gave her away every time. Someday, she might even be able to control her tell-tale giveaways...but yesterday it was the most hilarious and endearing thing to me ever.

Knowing that she will not be this way forever makes me sad. So very sad that both of my babies grow every single day and that soon, Giggle and Go Seek with Mommy will not be the most entertaining thing we could do. Sad that one day instead of pulling for my attention, both kids might push away. So, a letter to my kids.

Dear Babies:

You will always be my babies. I do not care how mature you become, I will always want the hugs and kisses I require every morning and night. My first job is to be your boss and teacher but second to that I want to always be your friend. I never want you to shut the door on me or think that I would not understand. I never want to worry about what you are going through or hurt because you feel like I am not the best person to help you work through what ails you.

I want to play games with you when you are 20, and hug you when you are 12. I want to be the Mommy with the magic bandaids forever, and the person who can mend your broken parts and make you smile even on the worst of days.

I always have your best interests in mind and want you to know that every rule and consequence is handed down with love. Learn from me, and learn from yourself. Make mistakes, and accomplish better. Be naughty, and be nice. Complain about your chores, and do a good deed. Be mean, and be kind. Be you, and know that I love every part of it.

The time to hold you both in my arms like an infant may be over, but I hold you in my heart the same way forever more. I love you.

So... I have two voices.

2011-08-23T11:48:00.003-05:00

It cannot be hard for you to believe that I have far more to say than what I publish here. This is my "mommy blog" if you have to put a label on it... and because I want it to be something warm and welcoming to the masses, it is filtered.

I know... transparency is important to people who become attached to others online. We like to know that we are interacting with a real and honest person. I know that is a big thing for me at least... knowing that what I am reading is the truth when it is supposed to be and that the author is really who I think they are.

So, the filters you have experienced here (and honestly, you have experienced the unfiltered parts occasionally too! Remember the Baby Powder post?) are usually language, unpopular opinion, political, and a few other common social filters that allow me to keep from alienating or upsetting someone who does not believe in foul language or other things that might be a reality in my life.

Because I have MORE to say, and want to do so without holding back... last night JodyB-Uncensored went live. It is a blog that promises to deliver EXACTLY what I would think or say on any random topic. I look forward to guest posts from others feeling the need to go balls to the wall without feeling the need to filter for the public as well. I look forward to airing a lot of feelings, opinions and humor that I would not normally publish here...and I look forward to seeing you all enjoy the passion and freedom if it as well!

Fear not though, for this blog will continue. It will still have as much as it did before... it will just be filtered the same as it always has!

So get over there and read about my feelings on a terrible piece of crap murderous father, or the stupid cats. Have fun. Laugh. Be adults. Be free!

And so it continues...

2011-08-22T11:19:00.000-05:00

You might remember my post from about a month ago, an open letter to the city of Rice, TX detailing my intent to absolutely fight their oppressive violation of homeowner rights by assuming "extraterritorial jurisdiction" over properties that they have no right to.

Here is what I know. There was no public hearing regarding their adoption of jurisdiction from the county. This entire neighborhood does NOT fall into the 1/2 mile "boundary" that they say it does no matter how you measure it. They have so many visible violations WITHIN the city limits, even AT THE MAYOR'S HOUSE...and it does not seem like they are doing anything to those homeowners... The law states that they cannot impose a citation or fine in the ETJ. Yet they still threaten it.

The city of Rice has not assumed jurisdiction over policing this neighborhood, or maintaining the roads either. We have no city sewage service, cannot vote in any city elections, etc. They ONLY thing they have done is assumed a position to tell us that we have to abide by city zoning codes and regulations regarding the property. If I call 911 with an emergency, I still have to wait for the sheriff's department. (Rice only has a police department to write speeding tickets on the highway anyway!) If my car gets swallowed up by the huge potholes in the road, there is nobody responsible (since the county won't adopt out streets either!) The city of Rice adopted jurisdiction to put money in their constantly empty pockets, but return no favor or service that might cost them something. Sounds about right.

But, I still got my letter. Telling me I have to "screen in" my carport if I want to keep stuff in it. Violation of Outside Storage was the official title of my violation letter. What is in my carport you might ask?

Our bicycles, a bicycle trailer, lawnmowers, air compressor (chained down), yard tools, an extra freezer I am trying to find a home for, and the kid's yard toys. We have a new portable shed that we need to finish putting together...but here is the deal, even if I move the yard tools and such into the shed... The air compressor needs to be NEAR THE TIRES of the cars. The bicycles won't get ridden if they are in the shed either...

So... I am being forced to screen in my carport, making it impossible to ever park a car in it ever again... so that the CODE ENFORCER that they hired SPECIFICALLY for this job, cannot see the tools and "storage" from a public area. I get NO benefit from this, because the city doesn't want to actually "own" this neighborhood.... they just want to try to get some money from us for "violating" codes that DO NOT APPLY TO US.

So, I will remind you City of Rice (and I REALLY encourage you to read the STATE laws regarding this!)

Pursuant to Chapter 42 SUBCHAPTER B. Sec. 42.021 (a) The extraterritorial jurisdiction of a municipality is the unincorporated area that is contiguous to the corporate boundaries of the municipality and that is located: (1) within one-half mile of those boundaries, in the case of amunicipality with fewer than 5,000 inhabitants

Pursuant to Chapter 212 Subchapter A, Sec 212.00 After a public hearing on the matter, the governing body of a municipality may adopt rules governing plats and subdivisions of land within the municipality's jurisdiction to promote the health, safety, morals, or general welfare of the municipality.

Pursuant to Chapter 212 Subchapter A Section 212.003 (b) A fine or criminal penalty prescribed by the ordinance does not apply in the extraterritorial jurisdiction.

I have plenty of other portions of the State Law printed out, but what I noted above pretty much takes care of my feelings. Neighborhood not entirely within the 1/2 mile boundary whether measured by road, or circular grid arrangement on map? NO DICE. No public hearing allowing homeowners to voice their opinions? NO DICE. Threaten me with a fine when the law clearly states they do not apply in the ETJ? NO DICE. Did I forget to mention as a resident of the COUNTY I am NOT allowed to vote for these stupid code adoptions or the council members/mayor who tell you to come harass innocent people?

Thanks for showing your ass Rice, TX. Notice that NO TRESPASSING SIGN out there? Obey it!

If you make this difficult for me, try to interpret the law only to benefit your treasurer's books or further harass my family while we continue to live OUTSIDE your city limits AND the ETJ you claim to have... you can expect this to go further.

Presidential Corn Dogs...

2011-08-16T16:34:00.001-05:00

It is like a bad joke... being photographed while eating is hardly every becoming, and adding a corndog as the food of choice makes it worse. Any publicity is good publicity? Even if your get called a "corn dog licker vying for the oral office?" It is pretty incredible how many photos one can find of politicians eating the ever popular wiener on a stick...
Food for thought folks... eating a corn dog does not make you seem identifiable or human... it just makes you seem hungry, and unconcerned with gross photos making the news!

Save the corn dogs!

(images compiled from Google Search and used according to the parody portion of the Fair Usage Act)

Things out of place...

2011-08-15T09:35:00.000-05:00

I really miss our microwave, and not for the reason you might guess. There is just an empty shelf there now, hollow and lonely beckoning for something to occupy its barren plane. I look towards it countless times a day, a quick glance that way to ascertain the time. But, the microwave with it's glowing digital clock is no longer there.

Empty. Timeless.

Silly I know. I use the microwave clock more than any other time device in our home. Now that the microwave has gone they way of the recycler, I miss those green glowing numbers and to be honest...the rapid method of warming leftovers too. But the clock is paramount.

Go figure, I blew up the microwave cleaning it. Had I left it with the exploded "whatever" hanging out on the interior roof I might not be amiss. Truthfully it was probably on the last leg and cleaning it wasn't the full culprit, but I still feel like the desire for a spotless microwave did her in. Still, I was reserved to a post-it note reminder of the out-of-order status stuck to the door so that the clock could remain.

Microwave had ideas of her own though, and it seems she was more than ready for departure from the place she had called home for so long. She was determined to be thrown out. Three nights ago, without notice she suddenly began turning herself on, and trying to burn my house down. Three times I cleared the ghostly cooking instructions from the timer and reset her to zero. On the fourth attempt to quell phantom microwave usage, and the subsequent tiny radioactive explosions occurring inside, I left the door open. Still, the timer set itself and tried to start again. Unplugging it was a must...

And with that, the clock was gone. No use for a piece of machinery that will not allow for a good scrub down and certainly no need for invisible cooks warming invisible food in the kitchen while we sleep. So, there she went. Out with the trash in the morning.

But I still look to the place where she should be, that green lighthouse of timely persistence out of place, and missing. Leaving me searching for the time.

Confidence

2011-08-14T20:26:00.003-05:00

Confidence. I like to think that I am a confident person. But in reality I am not. For as long as I can remember, the desire for people to like me and the feelings of never quite fitting in have always been there. I've never liked the internal struggle within groups of friends when it seems that everyone is always having closer relationships, pairing off or getting catty in between. I have never liked the competition most women place themselves in about being the prettiest, or the most affluent... I just don't.

But I am also always struggling to decide if people are real. If they are as honest as they seem to be with me and that if our friendship means to them what it means to me. I am who I am, and I am perfectly comfortable with that...but I am never happy to be judged for it.

It does not help that insecurity when, on more than one occasion a close, deeply important friend has burned me. It is almost like a broken heart, the feelings you get when someone you trust beyond measure violates it. You build a wall protecting yourself from it, and sometimes you even keep people at arms length to protect yourself and I am not sure if you ever completely heal from a thing like that.

So, I complain. I find another friend to talk to about it. Someone who might feel the same as me, and while trying to work through my own feelings I air my concerns to them. They act as a sounding board for my insecurity and my inner struggle and through them I find ways to get over the feelings.

However, as human nature predicts... sometimes that sounding board becomes another violator. Someone who uses private confidence against you and the cycle renews. Women are evil creatures. We gossip and we complain. We talk to Mary Sue about Peggy and Peggy about Mary Sue...and we hate it but we keep doing it. It is somehow impossible to stop, and we end up burning ourselves in the process...

So, for any person who has burned ME, it is ok. I forgive you. I might not ever talk to you again, but I forgive you. To anyone I have burned, I apologize. I really did not mean to hurt you. For anyone who ever feels like they do not fit in, we have all felt it. For anyone who feels they are superior or special? Stick it up your....

I'm Thankful on Thursday

2011-08-11T00:00:00.001-05:00

So often we all get wrapped up in things we need or want and forget to be thankful for what we have. Simply put, just thinking about all the things you do have to be thankful for can lift your spirits and make the little grievances fade. Thanks to this blog hop I am reminded to be thankful, and to shout my appreciation from the rooftops!

I am incredibly thankful for the love and support of the people around me. I am thankful for our health, and the smiles on the faces of my children silently thanking me for nothing in particular. I am thankful that I have my husband (even when he is hard to handle) and that he continues to have a job to provide the majority of our household income. I am thankful for my parents, my brothers and our extended family. I am thankful for my friends and my clients who continue to challenge me and keep me hopeful that one day my business will be as lucrative as I wish. I am thankful for the little things like the celery and cucumber in our fridge and the Dr. Pepper I apparently cannot live without. I am thankful for sunshine, and running water and the roof over our heads. I would be VERY thankful for some drought relief all across the state, and I hope it comes soon!

Most of all though, I am grateful for love, life, laughter and every single day.

Human Support

2011-08-09T22:43:00.000-05:00

Technical Support Call:

Thank you for calling Heavenly Father Hotline, this is Peter. Can I get your account number or date of birth and last name please?

Sure, that's February XX, 19XX.

and your last name?

Maiden or married?

The original last name on your account please.

Ok, XXXXXXX.

Thank you. How may I help you.

Well, I am having some issues that I hope you can help me with. They are pretty minor in comparison to the ails of the world but I really think my equipment is defective and I am hoping we can fix it.

ok. We will see what we can do, what is the problem.

Well, first of all, this is a 30 year old unit so obviously there is some wear and tear here from age but about 12 years after this account was opened, I started having all these inconveniences. About once a month the unit just starts acting like a real heifer, shuts down or acts all crazy for like four days...and then it will just start leaking fluid and being a major pain. I've dealt with it for a long time but I'd really just like for it to stop.

Hmm. Well I can see where that would be a pain but once a month we shut down all accounts for a mandatory download and cache dump...so it is sort of required. I can assure you though that eventually you will earn enough points on this account for that shut-down to become unnecessary and instead of the ten day inconvenience we will send you the upgrade package which includes a built in heater that will heat your unit up to 400* F and has some amazing "surprise" features I am sure you will love.

uh, ok. Well what about the maintenance? I mean..every single day I have to clean this damn thing off! The Anti-Virus grows overnight and I have to trim it back every other day! I don't even think it serves a purpose anymore...do you know how annoying it is to have to spend 20 minutes on maintenance every single day?

Well, you are right it is a glitch in the system and serves no real purpose. It was originally designed to protect the unit but that became obsolete a very long time ago. There is currently no patch for the stubble. Unfortunately, it gets worse too when you get the update.

CRAP! Ok, how about the size of this thing. I was really hoping you would offer a new, slimline upgraded unit today since I have been in this one for 30 years now. I mean, my account is pretty impeccable right? Do you not think I deserve some kind of update now? How about the operating system? I heard that Metabolism 2.0 was AWESOME... can we talk about getting the new Metabolism?

Well, we encourage our account owners to build their own instead. You need to keep it away from the junk, work it hard for at least an hour every single day and write your own code for a new OS. That makes it more personal and user specific.

hmph. The unit is not very attractive. I mean... the little feet on the bottom are starting to crack and the screen is showing age. There are some weird wrinkly things happening on the screen and it seems to be getting these darker spots...The controls are slow to respond and sometimes it just falls over in a heap...I mean is there anything I can do about the aesthetics and general wear and tear?

Well, we can make an appointment for you with a certified plastics repair guy but it is pricey...

UGH! So, is there anything you can help me with? Can I check on my husband's account and see if he is due for an equipment upgrade then? Every night at this time his outflow processor smells awful and if we could get a new system for that I might be happy...

No ma'am, you are not authorized to make changes to that account.

Well, thanks for nothing...

Noodling, Hand fishing and the art of a trot line...

2011-08-07T23:03:00.000-05:00

I remember the largest catfish I have ever seen quite vividly. I was a child, probably around 8 and the construction of Richland Chambers Reservoir was barely finished. People eager to reap the benefits of a newly impounded lake that was fed by two large Texas creeks famous for their catfish populations set up trot lines and fished that slowling rising water line like it was going out of style.

The fish was enormous. I remember all of the children running through the neighborhood to the yard where they had hung it from a mesquite tree...and there under the glow of a single portable light hung by its hook in the tree was a golden speckled fish whose tail brushed the ground and who's head was out of my reach.

I do not know what the fish weighed nor do I remember it being mentioned. I doubt the fishermen had a deep sea type scale to properly gauge it anyhow. Even though as an adult everything seems larger in a childhood memory, I know that fish was at least five feet long. If I had to guess today, knowing what I do about catfish in general, it was probably 80 to 100 pounds. Truly a large specimen.

Caught on a trotline, this monstrous catfish will forever be burned into my memory. Somehow that fish makes anything I have ever caught (and believe me, my record is sad!) seem paltry and small in comparison. I know those fishermen cleaned and ate it but I do not remember joining in...even though the flesh of that ancient catfish probably could have supplied the entire neighborhood with a few fillets...

It is no secret that the Mississippi and other large rivers were abundant with giant blue cats before the 1900's and that over-fishing quickly led to the demise of that giant gene pool. It was not uncommon for a 300 pound monster to be caught back then.

I do not doubt that these giant flatheads still reign in the deepest waters and remotest bends of creeks and rivers here in Texas today. Fewer in number maybe, but not gone. Many conscious fishermen throw back anything over 20 lbs in order to help the larger fish continue breeding and passing their superior genetics to the fish of their children's generation. This practice seems like an honorable way to help protect the old men of the catfish world.

Recently, the State of Texas passed a noodling or hand-fishing bill that would allow catfish to be taken by this archaic and dangerous way of sport-fishing. I am not sure that I support it. Not only will it put those smarter, more elusive giant catfish in grave danger of being caught and killed, it also places plenty of novice people in a position that they are definitely not prepared for.

Reaching one's bare hands into holes under water and grabbing for God-knows-what... and if a big fish is found having your hand as the bait...clamped tightly into the powerful jaws of an animal MADE for the water; a powerful muscular giant fish vs human battle ensuing in which you need to breathe and that big fish doesn't... I am sure you get my drift.

So, for those of you wondering where the biggest fish are, I won't tell you. I have heard stories of a 80 foot deep, spring water filled clay pit which flooded almost overnight, ripe with artificial habitat (read: sunken cars and equipment) that holds some big ones witnessed by SCUBA clad water rescue trainees...and anyone who has watched PBS knows they have been noodling in Oklahoma for a century... but I will remind you that the barbs on the big ones are bigger and underwater wrestling is ignorant. Good luck fellas but I'll stick to poles and trot lines, hand-fishing is just not for me for I have seen the big one in person and I know he would have won!

It is hard.

2011-08-06T22:11:00.000-05:00

It is hard for me to illustrate how bad the drought has gotten around here...but even the trees are wilting. Wild fires rage daily through what is left of grazing pastures and the only reason they have not gotten astronomically big is that bare places where NOTHING is growing serve as a fine fire-break.

Even the Johnson Grass is brown. If you know Johnson Grass... you know its bad.

The darker area in the background of this one is the remnants of a recent grass fire. I have no idea how they got it to stop. It must not have been windy that day for sure. There is nothing green at this farm, save for the distant trees, and even they are yellowing on the outer edges.

The darker area in the midground is a stock pond. There is still a tiny bit of water but the dark area was where it used to be. Do you see how beat down the tank-dam and pasture looks? This is not an over grazing issue. There has not been a chance for anything to grow!

So, it is bad. I was hoping it would not get THIS bad, but it has. I was hoping for a July rain... I mean if I have been struck by lightning in July surely it could have rained this year too... but no. It is August. It NEVER rains in August in this area...so...

Welcome to the dessert where even the yucca and cactus in my yard gave up.

I don't usually pay attention...

2011-08-01T15:54:00.000-05:00

...but I logged in to post about the HEAT today and noticed that as of my last entry, I had EXACTLY 400 posts. Immediately, I felt a little guilty because I did not hold a giveaway or anything for such an achievement. It has been a long time since I did that really...and I promise to find something amazing to do for all of you in appreciation of your wonderfulness.

This blog... Something that started as an outlet for me has become so much more... a catalyst for making new friends, all of which I feel so honored to know. A forum to air my frustrations and complaints. A place to praise my children, and then look back on a "bad" day to find something wonderful to remind me that it IS all worth it. A place to be thankful for all that I am blessed with, and an area of my life that means a great deal to me. A voice I did not know I had.

So today with post number four hundred and one... I say THANK YOU readers for what you have given me. I hope that I continue to provide what you originally came here for and always welcome comments and contact for ANY reason, good or bad. Thank you friends for being here to laugh at me, with me, and for me. Thank you for sharing your stories with me when I feel alone in my complaint, and thank you for correcting me even if I am too stubborn to listen. Thank you for sharing this journey with me, and I look forward to going further with you!

My original intent for a post today seems paltry in comparison to what I just said... but I will share that too.

It is HOT in Texas today. That might not seem out of the ordinary for most of you who know it certainly gets HOT in Texas every year... but we are officially HOTTER than normal. Under an EXTREME heat advisory in fact. Something that, feels worse than normal. Something that feels oppressive and a little like human abuse at the hands of an environment wrought with abnormality. Something that can be further illustrated by our indoor/outdoor thermometer...

The outdoor sensor for this thermometer is in perpetual shade. It is not being beaten down by the sun or enclosed from a breeze. At the moment this photo was taken it was 109* in the shade...moments earlier it read 111* and sometime within the past few hours or days it recorded a high of 113*. The low temperature (49*) was recorded withing the past 6 months but if feels like a lifetime ago... and 83* is the temperature of my home.

I do not want to make excuses, because I do have the thermostat set higher than most people dare to save energy... but it is EIGHTY THREE degrees INSIDE this house. It is only completely comfortable when we are sedentary and I have to shower after I finish cleaning every single day. I can also pretty much guarantee that surviving in an 83* house will not make my electric bill inexpensive. I can bet that it will indeed still be outrageous... but I cringe to think how VERY bad it would be if I had that thermostat on 75* like I would love to do.

So, readers that I dearly love, please pray for relief. There are people around me who are not as fortunate that make my 83* home look like heaven on earth today. There are people who cannot adequately cool their homes and some deaths have already occurred from this nearly nationwide heat wave. So... ask whomever you ask to send cooler weather. Rain would be a godsend too. Thank you.

Cowboy Boots

2011-07-30T00:07:00.000-05:00

Sometimes, your brother's hand me down cowboy boots are cool...

and other times, you need your mom to refurbish them!

Putting it out in the universe...

2011-07-27T22:26:00.000-05:00

We all do it at some point... neglecting our own needs and wants to do for others. At least we should. Mothers are the best/worst at putting many others before themselves. So, I am here to tell you that I have been neglecting myself.

I have only done my hair (when doing my hair means more than pulling my freshly shampooed mop into a pony tail) three times in the past three months. YIKES.

I have put on makeup fewer times than that. eh, I have never been big on makeup anyway!

My clothes look like shite. This is my fault for being thrifty and disgusted by the current offerings in my price range.

I need to be riding the bike more and working out. I made a promise to myself to get rid of my ~~muffin top~~ ~~spare tires~~ super fat rolls. But holy HELL it is HOT outside and I have never been good at an indoor workout.

This weeks meals have been served too late in the evening and have been too convenient, thus probably contributing to the fat. But again, it is hot. Do you like sweaty slaved over all day cooked meals? When I finish cooking I do not even have an appetite!

So, because I feel compelled to do more for me, I am going to try to find a daily workout on cable or the web that the kids and I can do together, I am going to buy only raw vegetables and fruits at the store this weekend, and I might get the bike out of the carport.

But, because I am never going to break my money-fast... I am putting my tentative Christmas wishlist out into the universe. These are things I want and desperately need for Christmas and if I do not document it now, I will surely forget before someone starts asking (ahem, Grandma)

Panties. I REALLY need new panties. Those close to me know which kind. If anyone else wants to buy some, think cotton, and granny. Forget sexy. I grew out of that years ago!

Clothes. I really want new clothes. Badly. Things that look nice, are not expensive and will last. Is that too much to ask for? I figured so..

A new camera. Just a want, not a need... But I want a nice one.

That is it folks. Remind me that I wrote this in a couple months when Granny comes calling foul for my lack of ideas!

In this heat...

2011-07-25T16:34:00.000-05:00

you have to be creative...

Finished...

2011-07-20T21:20:00.000-05:00

Birdy is on the WALL. I am not 100% sure that this is his permanent perch because I am still working on this wall... but for now, he has a home.

For anyone wanting to try this fun craft project... darn, I should have done step by step photos! But, it was super easy and I can totally do it again to show you! I am sure we could use another Birdy to beautify our space!

Coming along nicely...

2011-07-20T21:05:00.001-05:00

Black bird singing in the dead of night
Take these sunken eyes and learn to see
all your life
you were only waiting for this moment to be free
(McCartney/Lennon)

He is not black... and he won't sing, but he sure looks like a bird to me.

He's beginning to look a lot like Birdy

2011-07-18T21:05:00.000-05:00

Man, I CAN-NOT wait to show you how this early stage papier mache birdy ends up, and how I will use him to decorate!

I am VERY excited to be getting back a bit of my personal creativity!

Oh no you DIDN'T.

2011-07-17T22:59:00.001-05:00

To Whom it May Concern:

I recently received a courtesy letter from the “City of Rice” proclaiming that through “Extraterritorial Jurisdiction” that the mentioned city officially has the right to enforce code violations dealing with public health and nuisances in that jurisdiction outside the boundaries of their city limits.

The letter proclaims that it serves as a courtesy, and an opportunity of thirty days of grace in order to correct “Ordinance out of Compliance” before they send a Code Enforcement/Compliance Officer to help clean the community.

I disagree and would like to officially request that my property be removed from the City of Rice “Extraterritorial Jurisdiction.” This enforcement of City Codes upon a resident outside the City Limits is unconstitutional, especially when that resident does not benefit from other city services such as police patrol or jurisdiction, sewage treatment, street maintenance, drainage or the opportunity to VOTE in any city election including the adoption of such ordinances.

If the City of Rice is to be allowed to enforce their codes upon me, a resident of the county, I officially request that they also run a sewer line to my home, bring the PRIVATE ROAD that I live on up to code including street repair and the construction of proper drainage ditches, and allow me to vote in all City elections including councilman and mayoral elections.

I agree that making our community safe is a priority, but if I wanted to live somewhere where open carports and storage areas visible from the road were not allowed I would move into town. Living in the COUNTY outside the realm of corrupt governmental control has many benefits, and I see that the City of Rice would now like to strip me of those rights and cite me with fees, fines and liens on my property so that they can boost their bank accounts with more than speeding tickets from the interstate.

If I receive a ticket, notice, fee, fine, or other correspondence from the City of Rice on this matter, they can expect a fight. Good Luck Rice. It will be hard to provide reasons why you are picking on people outside your city limits when the properties within your realm are not even compliant.

I HEREBY REFUSE TO BE ABUSED BY BUREAUCRATIC IGNORAMUSES THAT I AM NOT EVEN ALLOWED TO VOTE FOR. The gloves are off Rice. Lets go.

2011-07-14T21:58:00.000-05:00

Do you know what happens when you play dress up with real makeup and a two and a half year old? I do!

I promise that I am NOT naturally that ashen shade of fake, that my skin is NOWHERE near that clear and that Annalee was not born three decades too late...

As I thought I belonged in the 60's and 70's...it is clear to me that she is a child of the 80's! Just have a look at her makeup skills!!!!

What would you grab?

2011-07-09T22:52:00.000-05:00

Most people have pondered it: What would you grab on the way out of your burning house? If the people and pets were safe, what posessions would you try to save? Family photos? Great-Grandma's china cabinet? Jewelry box? The new fridge and the front load washer and dryer? These things, some of them however ridiculous, are all on my list... but today something new got added to it... Something I am thinking about loading onto all the electronic devices and then putting in the fireproof box with birth certificates and car titles...

For my Tenth Wedding Anniversary I did not get a ring upgrade. No fancy diamond jewelry at all, as the modern gift list suggests. No tin or aluminum as the traditional list proclaims. We did not renew our vows, or take a sabbatical ten year honemoon. I got something far more amazing to me. Something I will treasure far more than you can imagine...
I got this:

It is Platinum, and I am REAL glad Karl did not save it for our 70th as the list suggests.

As far as house fires it better be in the box or I am coming back in to find Freddie.

Ten Years and a Day

2011-07-08T17:11:00.000-05:00

Three thousand, six hundred fifty four days ago I became a wife. Karl and I celebrated our Tenth Wedding Anniversary yesterday, and as cliche as it sounds, I cannot believe it has been that long.

As much as our relationship has changed, evolved and become less couple-centric and far more a family affair; I can honestly say that I cannot imagine being without him. Those vows spoken ceremoniously...for better, for worse, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, for as long as we both shall live... they are not just words. They are a promise, and not just between two people. A promise left behind from the past, a whole lot of people who knew... you will have the most wonderful days together and the worst. There will be days you want to hold your partner, and days you would like to strangle them... and ten years from the date you said I do, you will look back and remember the best parts without a second thought of the worst.

Karl, I love you... for all your endearments and even through your faults. Thank you for ten years, and a hundred more to come.

Casey Anthony

2011-07-05T19:09:00.000-05:00

I want to be brutally honest for just a second... I really thought Casey Anthony would be convicted of Aggravated Manslaughter, and Child Neglect/Abuse. I was prepared to hear that she "beat" the Murder 1 charge because of the evidence being circumstantial but for the rest of the felony charges to be unanswered for and the very real thought that Casey Anthony will walk away on Thursday a free woman makes me queasy.

Feeling Funky with the Messy Marvins

2011-07-05T11:35:00.002-05:00

Sometimes, I wake up and walk out into the common living areas of our home and shake my head... There is nothing worse that waking up to chores. I really should not go to bed without picking up stuff like toys and maybe even vacuuming because waking up to a hefty load of work makes me crabby.

Having children who were consistent in picking up after themselves would help too... I mean, if we are making grandiose wishes I would like to add that to the list. There is something to be said for children with a little OCD. Too bad that was not on the order form when I placed my request for mine.

While we are discussing such things, I am pretty sure I did not check "hopelessly sloppy husband" when I was making out that order either... I mean, I am the QUEEN of mess. Did the powers that be think it would be funny to give me three other people in one household who are all as needlessly messy as I am? Just one person who maybe enjoyed cleaning, or had a clinically diagnosed organizational problem would not have hurt...

and now? Now I need to go start some laundry, vacuum a living room and make some lunch for a couple of messy marvins who will undoubtedly drop something on the floor. Thank goodness I ordered a hungry dog when I was putting this perfect existence together in my head!

God is an Alien, and other unpopular yet plausible theories

2011-07-02T15:34:00.002-05:00

Throughout my short life, I have swayed in many directions regarding my own spirituality. Some periods of faithlessness were caused by forces completely outside my control and other times it was my own questioning of Christian teachings versus science that left me out in the cold.

I have found it very difficult to reconcile faith with science, no matter how deeply I dig into either looking for the truth. By nature I prefer hard evidence, and neither faith nor theoretic science guarantees me that. Whether you believe in anything or nothing you know that blindly following what someone else tells you to is not the honest or smart way to approach life. We must question and seek our own personal truths and wait for a time in which something proves us right or wrong.

Through much research, reading, thought and contemplation I have come to my current state of mind. As fickle-human as I am, things surely do change and I cannot warranty that my thoughts are gospel, nor can I gurantee that I myself will not decide that I am absolutely incorrect.

God is an alien. Science tells me so. He absolutely exists, and absolutely created me in his own image! He is not some spiritual unseen entity of great power...He is a "flesh and blood" incarnation of immortal, omnipotent, omnipresent and very alive life. He reigns over me from the "heavens," observes His people from afar and judges us with a heavy hand and a huge heart just as he promises.

Think I am crazy? Maybe I am...but consider this. Remove the word alien from the equation.

God created us in his own image. He breathed life into our world and into our lungs. He can see us, yet we cannot see him as he protects us, guides us and judges our souls. If we have accepted him, and lived a God-fearing life we are granted an eternal existence with him. (If that is not the synopsis of a good Sci-Fi thriller, I just do not know how to make a better one!)

Start with the creation of a human being. Science cannot prove to us that we really did evolve from prehominid ancestors. The proverbial missing link elludes them, and they cannot account for a sudden evolutionary advancement that should have taken millions of years, but instead seems to have occurred in the relatively short spanse of a couple hundred thousand years instead. The first woman- "suddenly" appears without a real link to her apparent homo-erectus ancestors.

Creationism teaches us that Adam was created from the clay and the dust or Earth and Eve of his own body as a perfect match to him. Is that first woman really Eve, and was she created by our (alien) God, in his image by splicing the DNA from existing hominid species and that of himself? Could it be that we were absolutely created by our God with his technology, knowledge and power in a laboratory not unlike the ones our scientists use today to play their own godlike games with DNA themselves? Have I lost you yet?

There are many plausible theories as to why an alien race would create a hybrid of themselves and homo X on this planet. Slaves, necessity, experiment...and why they would leave us behind. My thoughts are that we were created to serve a smaller purpose and the precocious human became much more to our creator...a creation that he loved beyond measure but felt guilt for at the same time. He did not abandon us though...he keeps watch. His promises are not forgotten and his impact as our Father lives on in pieces of every religion of the world. Hints and clues to his truthful existence, remnants of his time here and promises of his future return and all that goes along with it.

He sends us signs and miracles to reassure our faith. Old Testament stories like those of Moses and Noah can absolutely be explained, not by magic as some would believe...but by our God being from another world of unprecedented technology and advancement. A burning bush that speaks to Moses, used to conceal his true identity and allow him to give us rules. A great flood for which Noah was provided instructions in order to cleanse the Earth of failures and debauchery and ensure that the people of Earth that remained believed, and were good.

Can you not see the correlation of Mary's dreamlike hallucination and virginal conception of Jesus Christ as his intervention in a real and physical way? Jesus, his only begotten Son actually placed in Mary's unconsummated womb by his divine intervention. A real Immaculate Conception as the prophecy explained to her played out right before her eyes.

I do not ask you to believe me. I ask you to open your mind to the thought that a real coexistence of science and religion can absolutely be a reality if science and religion are absolutely the same thing. These are not the only theories that hold merit... just examples. I cannot tell you which one is absolutely correct because I do not know if any of them are. Just as you, I will be judged one day before our God and hopefully then we can know the truth.
For a lot of people (like me!) who cannot justify what science has already taught us with what faith has traditionally required us to believe, something like these theories, something scientific to grasp onto is golden.
Finally, I urge you to consider the Vatican when considering these theories... The Vatican. The Pope. The entity that the largest (and original) organized Christian denomination followers consider their direct line to God and the supreme authority on how they should believe issued a statement regarding Aliens. In a nutshell, the Pope wants you to believe in aliens. Why would they possibly broach that subject without a vast piece of knowledge.?

Thanks for listening. I know it is an absurd thought to most, and unpopular at best... but for me it is the only way I can reconcile the pieces of my own soul (my spiritual half, and my scientific half) and come out the other end with something to believe in.

HOTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

2011-06-27T13:44:00.001-05:00

It happens every year, I wish and pray for Spring because I am tired of the cold... and then in true Texas form it gets so freaking hot that I cannot even mop my own kitchen floor without sweating like I am sitting in a sauna.

My indoor outdoor thermometer reads 100* outside, and 80* inside. The air is running like it should (I have it set higher than some people like to help with energy consumption) and I am drenched in sweat after a vigorous sweeping and mopping session that I could not put off any longer...

Save for doing my household chores in the nude (here, have some brain bleach. I know THAT mental image was NOT a kind one!) or hiring someone who doesn't mind sweating like a stuck pig... I am at a loss. I already need a shower and fully intend to take one as soon as a I vacuum the living room. So, as of today... if I see one person spill orange juice on the floor or get pretzel crumbs on the carpet you have to put money in the jar. The Holy CRAP I should get paid to clean up after YOU people Jar. It is like a swear jar, but instead of paying for your foul language, you are paying me so that I do not feel like cussing you out.

Now, I am going to eat a popsicle.

2011-06-25T12:42:00.001-05:00

These two make my heart beat. It is the little pieces of my heart that they took with them as I grew them in my womb that makes my world spin, and my days worthy of notice. Not a day goes by that I am not thankful for them, though, usually it is in their sleepfilled silence that I get a moment to ponder how wonderful they are.

Raising children is not easy. I did not expect it to be. I also did not expect my children to be so challenging.

I do not even know what to call it, even though my parents tell me that they are both just like me. They really were not lying when they said my children would repay me for all the gray hairs and wrinkles I expertly engraved onto the faces of my parents. My love for these children, and my desire for them to behave a certain way or learn certain things sometimes feels oppressive. An emotion I can liken only to failure...that I am doing something wrong and that "this will never work." That no matter how many times I utter the word no, or give calm and collected lessons on how to be good...they will just never get it.
\
Other people use all kinds of words to describe their own children like mine. Spirited. Difficult. Stubborn. While any of these might be absolutely true, I am not intent on labeling them. They are independent, intelligent, challenging and active. Particular, stubborn, defiant, and inquisitive. They question my authority before ever considering to follow it. They hear what they want to hear, and overlook the rest with precise definition. They argue their position with a lawyer's intensity, and fight for their rights like nobody's business.

They are me, times two or three, with a whole sack of much more thrown in. Their muchness is quite intact with no sign of waning...

To risk sounding ungrateful for these blessings bestowed upon me; I want to ask a question. Will I ever not feel a tinge of question in the back of my soul? Will I ever not wonder if I am doing right by them allowing so much of their wildness shine through?

I have been beyond proud of these children who challenge me. I have seen the way they can control themselves. I have watched my son garner many awards for behavior and accomplishment after his first year of school. I have known him to be golden when I was not around... but in this place where they are most comfortable allowing their intrepidity to control their actions, their defiance and inpulse to rule the day, they continue to test me.

I want to pass this test.

Sometimes...

2011-06-23T23:40:00.000-05:00

Sometimes, I find kittens sleeping in cardboard boxes and I feel bad about throwing them away the next day.

Sometimes I drop a stack of mail into the blue outgoing mail box at the post office, and then wonder if I put stamps on it.

Sometimes, I wish I had a chiropractor for a relative even though I have never been to one. I just somehow know I would like it.

Sometimes, I manage to do something without messing it up, dropping it, or having to fix it before calling it done.

Sometimes, I geet insanely frustrated by simple things.

Sometimes, I forget to do things even though I probably wrote it down on three different to-do lists.

Sometimes, I find myself trusting too much, and sometimes I find myself trusting too little.

Sometimes, I notice things peripherally that are odd, out of place or downright scary.

Sometimes, I bite my tongue.

Sometimes, I eat crow and other times I wedge my foot so far into my mouth that I think I might never retrieve it.

Sometimes, things work out perfectly. Occasionally. Rarely.

Sometimes, I just need a break.

Sometimes, I kiss sleeping children.

Sometimes, I kiss conscious and awake children, if I can catch them.

Sometimes, I find random vegetables growing in my yard. Right now I am nursing a pumpkin vine that happens to live UNDER the deck. I hope he is happy enough to save me from buying them come October.

Sometimes, I publish a blog post that probably makes no sense to anyone but me, and that is always OK with me.

A One Day Vacay

2011-06-16T22:36:00.000-05:00

We had our annual "One Day Vacay" today, and it was to a place some of my loyal readers will recognize. We just REALLY love Glen Rose, TX and all that she offers. When the beach plans were scrapped for this week, it was the first place Ryan mentioned as an alternative and even though I spent countless days researching so many options, we ended up right where I thought we would. Glen Rose, where the Paluxy and Brazos Rivers flow, and dinosaurs most definitely once roamed. Where Big Rocks, and Blue Holes are ever present and the scenery cannot be beat. Glen Rose, where I told Karl I want a few acres, backing up to the river where I can build a little vacation cabin of my own. Oh the dream.

and now, a day vacay in photos.

Ryan does a good job in educating his sister about dinosaur claws

and a fantasy view of an amazing thought... what IF they survived whatever killed them off?

one hot, sweaty, river water coated, happy, smiley, beautiful girl.

The perpetrator. Fossil Rim is home to some GORGEOUS zebras. Who are a little pushy. This one was not happy with Karl. Karl apparently feeds too slowly. So... he bit the car window. Then he bit the mirror. Then he chased us, twice and surprised Karl both times. It was hilarious.

The most friendly giraffe I have ever met. If he would have fit in the car, he could have (and would have voluntarily) come home with is.

a full day in our favorite place can even get THIS boy to nap. Amazing.

Our new best friend (again.) Really the coolest guy ever.

Sorry that I am a bad mommy and did NOT get any good shots of the kids in the Blue Hole on the Paluxy, or ANY of the dinosaur prints that cover the river bottom. I also left the camera in the car for the 2 mile hike Ryan and I completed down the nearly dry Paluxy River at Big Rock Park.Since Glen Rose shares our serious drought, the rivers were very low and it would have been perfect for photos... but since this is DEFINITELY not our last trip to the area, I promise... next time.

Now, does anyone have relatves on the Paluxy who would let me build a little vacation cabin? PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE.

Back in the day...

2011-06-13T21:08:00.000-05:00

Since my children know how to use my iPhone better than I do, I wanted to give them a lesson about the days before "modern technology" ruled the world, otherwise known as the Nineties. (hardy har har. Funny..but true.) It was hard.

There is an old, non working pay phone used as decoration at a local store, and Ryan has already proven to be obsessed with it so I started there. Phone. Connected to the wall. That you had to put money in. A foreign concept for a child of the 21st Century. Continuing with that theme I explained the land line home phone. Even when we did have one here in the house, it wasn't used for phone calls. Since Nanny and Papa have one it was easy to explain it though.

More difficult was life without internet. I cannot even imagine life without the internet, but for a child who was born with a silver keyboard in their hand it seems even more foreign. So, I briefly brought up Encyclopedias and other research tools. Ryan thought I was crazy.

I realized that life was a whole lot different before I had so much information at my literal fingertips. Updated and constantly current perfectly easy to find information. The world as powered by Google.

As I slowly stopped trying to explain a different time to my child, and waxed nostalgic for a time when a library trip was almost always required to write a paper, and calling home to let the parents know I was running late required twenty five cents, I realized at how very convenient my world had become.

So, thank you Microsoft and Apple. Gracias Google and Yahoo. Wikipedia, I love you bunches and online medical websites, ye are my friend. You have saved me from the expense and storage issues of an entire set of Encyclopedias and their ever needed yearly updates and limited space for information. You have given me a phone I can use wherever I may find myself, and a Navigator App to get my lost self out of there. You have given me a totally non-Scrabble copyright like game that I can play with my friends hundreds of miles away, and a super nifty way to find out what the best way to treat a cough for a two year old.

Bring on the technology people. Keep it coming. I would be lost without it.

Pickles

2011-06-06T20:58:00.001-05:00

Pickles. You can buy a lot of varieties of pickles, or you can make you own. One thing is for sure though, whether it is a baby kosher or a bread and butter slice, pickle people love their pickles.

Pregnant women might crave them with icecream, and others might drink the juice. Here in Texas, you can even order them up deep fat fried. Pickles are a staple of most American hamburger lunches, and certainly go fine with a turkey club... but imagine paying premium price for something deemed a "gourmet pickle," only to find out that it might not be more than a regular old restaurant pickle, repacked into a jar and sold for 100 times it's original price.

Blasphemous? People have been hoodwinked? Rip off?

Pickle people, take this seriously because I have some information that might blow a hole in your gourmet pickle fantasy. Top Secret Stuff.

A pickle boutique might be selling you regular old every day bulk purchased pickles for a hell of a lot more money than they are "worth." A purveyor of prized pickled preferences is probably pulling your leg.

HUSH YO MOUTH.

These expensive baby cukes boast a jar and a label which clearly states "hand prepared and hand packed." Abiguous, huh? Exactly how legal is the jargon there? Probably just enough.

My informant says that there are plenty of five gallon green commerical grade pickle buckets lurking somewhere near the proprietor of pickle paradise. Furthermore, it is widely whispered that those restaurant grade pickles are removed from one bucket, crammed into a pretty jar, and sold to you (the cured cucumber connoisseur) for a whole lotta moolah.

I really don't care if they salt and pepper the jar, or add anything... that ain't an artisan pickle if that cucumber started out pickled already...but the rumor is they do not even do that.

So the next time you feel compelled to spend twenty odd bucks on a jar of briney delight; beware. You can probably get the same enjoyment from the two buck chuck version at the grocery store.

Give and Take...Alt. Title: Give me my Mother of the Year Award.

2011-05-30T21:41:00.000-05:00

I am all about the give and take. You let me wash your hair precious precocious daughter, and then I will let you____________. You sit down in the cart at the grocery store and make as little ruckus as possible children, and I will get you __________. You know; negotiation with terrorists in order to maintain sanity. By no means a sound parenting technique, but sometimes, a necessary thing.

So, just go ahead and give me my Mother of the Year Award, because what I am about to tell you is some quality stuff.

Today I got to see my friend. My dear lovely amazing friend who happens to be a mother to a pre-school grad, and three 2 year olds. Triplets. who are only a couple months older than Annalee. One with a sensory disorder. All girls. I've mentioned her a million times, but if you ever need a friend to make you feel absolutely inadequate, she is your lady.

It was a Memorial Day picnic at her mom's home, graciously put on for several of their friends and loved ones while my friend, her husband and brood visit from a couple million miles away. If by some miracle they were able to live here I am pretty sure I would need a season pass to her house. VIP. Members only. Backstage access.

Ryan was on my hot list. Not because he was inherently bad, just because he is intrepid...and his sister follows. He was grabby, and investigative. He likes to mess with stuff. I am considering reinstating the hands behind your back rule. Seriously. It was my friend when he was very small, and I think we need to revisit it.

The food at the picnic was great and nearly 100% gluten free for the specialized diets required by some of the attendees. I was pretty impressed by the hummus and need to find out if it was homemade or bought...

and, after a couple hours, Annalee fired up a nice Vesuvian meltdown as only she can deal out...there was even a moment of Mommy abuse involved...but thankfully I knew that my friend, with her triple dose of two year olds (special needs for one or not) could totally relate...and we retreated for a much needed Annalee nap.

I promise...there is a point to my story, the give and take.

So, my two little terrorists were allowed a fun outing, with food, bubbles, balls, bread to toss at ducks and turtles and new friends...fun stuff. But I am pretty sure that 195ish days of Kindergarten has me slightly rusty in my negotiations with the boy. I am going to need some freshening up!

My "take" for the day was Ryan falling asleep before 8pm on the sofa while watching a movie. That was a pretty nice take for the first official night of Summer break, which he says means "no bedtime." pshht. scoff. huff.

Now? Now, I need to give again. Annalee is looking for an almost nightly ritual. Something only she could get away with without a heart attack or needing new jeans... because I am the Mother of the Year. Something that she is really going to miss when I finally use up this darn can of RediWhip.

My love, it is past your bedtime, why are you up? Cream, IN my mouth please!!!!

Oh Happy Day

2011-05-27T11:48:00.001-05:00

Today is the last day I had to wake up before even chickens do, to put my Ryan onto the bus. It is not his last day; Memorial Day Monday is scheduled as a full day in order to make up for a bad weather day and I am really wondering which idiot thought a traditionally celebrated outdoor activity family holiday would make a good make-up day... but we will survive. Karl is off, so he can get the boy up and ready and I will be snug in the bed celebrating my first official day of Summer.

I would be lying if I did not say I have been looking forward to this Summer break since... well... the 10th week of school or so. I missed my boy, and I missed our fun. I would also be lying to you if I did not admit that come the third week of Summer, when we are getting bored with all of my well thought out activities and Ryan is driving me up the wall crazy that I will not be wishing for school to start anew. It is a vicious cycle that I am prepared for...sort of.

These two loves of my life never cease to amaze me. Ryan: the boy who has never been that great of a rule follower and certainly spends momentous amounts of time turning my hair gray recieved his Kindergarten diploma on Tuesday night. It was a pretty awesome occasion and the gaggle of fresh first graders put on a great show. If your kids do not know the Hip Hop Tooty Ta you MUST pull up the YouTube video and teach it to them immediately. I am certain that it was invented to entertain the teachers!

With that diploma, Ryan was also lauded by recieving several awards, for which I was exceedingly proud. Superintendent's Honor (all A's across the board) Principal's Award for Outstanding Citizenship (yes, this BOY) a Language Arts Achievement Award, a Fine Arts Achievement Award and a Six Flags reading certificate. Not bad son, not bad at all. Now can we transfer some of that Outstanding Citizenship to home life? I didn't think so.

So here he is, the Kindergarten Grad and his first teacher (other than Mom!)

I said these TWO never cease to amaze me... well Annalee is a maniac. I am not sure what to do with her! She has not destroyed anything since the baby powder incident... and that makes me very happy but she is so particluar and sassy right now that instead of grays she is just making me pull all my hair out instead. So... a peaceful picture of my little wild cat. Nothing comes between a girl and her (mom's) iPhone. Nothing I tell ya!

A Bedtime Conversation with an Articulate Two Year Old

2011-05-23T12:04:00.000-05:00

Me: Annalee, I really need you to lie down and close your eyes. It is past your bedtime.

Annalee: Ok Mommy, but I am NOT sleepy.

Me: I bet you are. Lets close our eyes together and think of a story.

Annalee: I want to watch Diego.

Me: Ok, well close your eyes and imagine Diego. What does he look like?

Annalee: Well, he has legs, and two arms for reaching up and rescuing animals, and a belly and a back. That is all, Now turn on the TV.

Me: Well, can you imagine what Dora looks like?

Annalee: Same thing. Legs, arms, back belly... same thing.

Me: Well, close your eyes and imagine Diego and Dora are rescuing animals.

Annalee: No, I want to SEEEEEEEE them.

Me: Well it is far too late for TV.

Annalee: PLEEEEEEEASE. Ryan is alseep, Daddy is asleep I want to watch Diego. I can go get the remote.

Me: no, it is time for sleep.

Annalee: But I AM NOT TIRED!!!!!

Me: Yes you are. If I turn the TV on it is going to be a Mommy show like the news.

Annalee: Ok, first Diego, then a Mommy show.

Me: That is NOT what I said.

Annalee: Mom, you are crazy.

Me: Annalee, your negotiation skills are impeccable. How about I sing you a song?

Annalee: No, I sing you a song.

Hush Liddle Baby Don't say a word
Mommas gonna buy me a monkey bird
If that monkey bird don't sing
Mommas gonna buy me a diamond ring
If that diamond ring is glass
Momma's gonna buy me a.......
(Momma, what you gonna buy me now?)

Me: Annalee, the diamond ring turns brass, and then Momma buys a looking glass.

Annalee: Oh, a working glass. Mommas gonna buy me a working glass.
If that working glass gets broke,
Momma's gonna....
*snore.*

Baby Powder (WARNING, explicit language!)

2011-05-19T21:31:00.002-05:00

****If you might be offended by a pissed off parent's foul language, stop reading.*****

Do you know what a just opened brand new container of baby powder looks like when it is absolutely emptied out all across your bedroom? Do you know what a six year old boy and two year old girl do when you enter that room just as the cloud begins to reach tornadic proportions as the ceiling fan whirls a white cloud of dust into your sleeping atmosphere. Do you know what a six year old who DEFINITELY knows better but STILL failed to stop the two year old from emptying it says when he realizes he is in the biggest trouble of his life. I heard the laughing. I know he was involved. So when he points that finger once again at someone else because OF COURSE he didn't do it what the hell am I supposed to do? I DO NOT CARE WHO STARTED IT, WHO DID IT OR WHO YOUR FINGER IS POINTED TOWARDS. WERE YOU IN THE ROOM? DID YOU SEE SOMETHING BAD? THEN WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING JOINING IN INSTEAD OF YELLING AT ME?????

Do you know what it sounds like when the only thing you can muster is to lock them both in their bedrooms while you attempt to clean up baby powder? Do you know what it feels like when locking them into their bedroom is the LEAST of the evils you can think of while you look at the baby powder than is so goddamn thick it looks like fucking father Christmas took a big fat snow shit all over your bed and floor. Do you know how encouraging it is while you try to clean up something that is impossible to clean up, and you just creating a bigger dust cloud and make it one hundred percent impossible to sleep in your own bed if you want to be able to breath just a little bit?

Did I mention it was a BRAND effing new can of baby powder? Did I mention it wasn't even for them, but MY OWN chaffed ass from hanging out at Field Day all day serving up snowcones to a whole gaggle of 4 to 9 year olds and giving thumbs up to the goddamn six year old who could have just taken that can of fucking baby powder, told his sister that it was a no-no and brought it to me?

Once. JUST ONCE I would like for my child to do the right thing. ONCE. As I sit here on my chapped ass, listening to my daughter's silence and the incessant wailing coming from the six year old's closed door, I wonder WHY it is impossible to leave a can of baby powder on top of a dresser that the two year old cannot even REACH. Who the hell got it down in the first place? AND WHY. WHY did the six year old not stop her. Because apparently, baby powder is all fucking fun and games until your momma catches you white fucking handed, sitting in a pile of your own self righteousness.

**edited by popular demand, to add a photo...

Self Confidence vs. Self Righteousness

2011-05-18T13:48:00.000-05:00

Self Confidence. Important.
Self Righteousness. Bad.

Silence

2011-05-09T12:15:00.001-05:00

For those of you who are regular readers, I am certain you have noticed long periods of silence here. I truly am sorry for it, but I just have not had a lot to say. The world seems to be spinning around me into intricate webs of activity and occurence and I have been dormant in thought.

I have felt blessed and somehow unfairly fortunate, as all of those tornadoes that tore through Alabama and the deep south started here first. Two straight days of sirens and taking cover in my area with no major loss made me feel...even more sad and empathetic for the people to my east who were very badly and sadly affected by those storms. Solidarity came from my own experiences with ONE tornado in October, followed by absolute disbelief that one day...a simple 24 hours can produce so much pain and heartbreak.

The death of Osama bin Laden at the hands of my government... well, I did have a lot to say about that, or more precisely the way people around me and all over this country reacted to it, but I have since learned that my opinion is just a drop in the bucket of varying views on the subject and it is best for my own sanity if I keep silent there too.

Gas prices and the inevitable trickle down effect it has on grocery and commodity prices... I am not sure our area can survive much more and unless one of our grocery stores starts allowing extreme couponing, we might be eating Ramen Noodles more regularly than I would ever like. I wonder if there is something I can "cut" them with to reduce the sodium...

So... we are in a season of heartache, change, and development. Learning new ways to deal with old problems and trying to be silent. Someone, I am sure, told you once that if you did not have anything nice to say not to say anything at all and that is my new mantra. I have a lot of not so nice things to say to or about a lot of people, so I am attempting to be silent... to reserve my words for when things turn around. A rebirth. A new cycle. A period of goodness, and prosperity and smiles that I am praying will come.

Dancing (or lying) in the street...

2011-04-29T22:29:00.000-05:00

The Annual Derrick Days Street Dance was tonight.

While Ryan was getting dressed, he said.."Mom, I cannot wait to debut my new moves. You haven't even seen these moves yet."

I was ready for a good show.

Annalee danced the night away with a stranger..

and Ryan...well... His moves were NOT what I expected.

Sometimes

2011-04-25T10:41:00.000-05:00

Sometimes I cannot blog about what I want. Sometimes I do not do the things I want to do. Sometimes, I cannot say all the things I want to say. That is ok with me, and I hope it is ok with you.

I caved...for a minute

2011-04-15T10:10:00.000-05:00

Last night, as a typical Spring thunderstorm moved into our area and the radio sent out the tell-tale alerts for a warning into the wee hours of the morning, I got a little antsy as usual. I have never been the coolest head in severe weather; always slightly on edge and on occasion in full panic mode. Cosidering my brush with being indirectly struck by lightning two Springs ago, my respect for thunderstorms is warranted. Considering I watched an F-4 tornado tear up my tiny town from a few miles away in October, which from my vantage point looked like it was taking my house too... I might have a few experiences that do not lend to calm thoughts when a storm approaches. I am not good in storms.

Very few lighning bolts lit the sky last night, and even less thunder pierced the quiet sleeplessness that Karl and I shared. Wind that gusted and whistled its way through the open windows blowing the curtains in a frenzy, and a sprinkle or two of rain were enough to make me bring the patio cushions in when the next dilemma struck.

Should we close the windows so that it doesn't rain in?

The short answer is: there really is nothing worse than wet carpet and furniture and children due to high winds and rain. However, if you know me, you know I am still cooling my home without the central air conditioning system. It is a battle I have been fighting off and on for four weeks as temperatures soar into the nineties, and just as I think I can take it no more a cool front provides me with 73 degrees for a high.

The muggy nights are the worst, as I do not sleep well at all if it is hot or uncomfortable. Even though it would get down in the low seventies, I even noticed the kids were restless on the worst nights. Humidity makes nice temperatures feel gross, but I persevere. After a cold winter of high heating bills, I just have not been ready or willing to be at the mercy of my central unit again. Avoiding its use is not only fiscally responsible; I like to think that it is also envirometally beneficial. The longer I wait to give in to the Texas Summer, the better it is for my checkbook and my planet.

There we were, faced with a choice. Go to bed, with the windows high and risk a faux ocean spray to every room at any moment, or close up shop. Closing up the house guaranteed suffocation unless the air was turned on, and the conundrum was painful. I caved... I let Karl close the windows, and turn on the air. I felt like a traitor.

Of course after all of that, it never really rained. The wind continued and a light shower showed itself for a minute but nothing like the good old Texas thunderstorm that the radio promised. No hail, no flash flooding, absolutely NO reason to close the windows at all.

Two things remain true however: Even with the best laid plans, I can always come out the other end feeling like a dummy, and that thunderstorm sucked in some cooler air, so the windows are open again this morning. I caved, but only for a moment and my bank account appreciates my efforts.

Summer, take your time getting her please, 80 degrees is hot enough for a while.

2011-04-11T09:59:00.000-05:00

It was one of those days... a day in which nothing had gone right and my mood was ragged to show for it. From the moment I rolled out of bed to start the day things started piling up and I felt like I could crumble at any moment.

Force clothes on the boy right before the bus turns the corner, drop a raw egg on the way from the fridge to the stove, spill milk on the counter. Mop the floor only to have juice spilled on it seconds later, and turn on the news, only to focus attention on watching the expensive TV slowly break more and more in the upper right corner. Tantrums over hair brushing, clothing and food. Messes in the living room, olives on the floor. Inside, outside, inside more. Wax on the shelf, dust on everything. Two hours of cleaning ruined in a minute. Tantrum. Dance. Sing. Tantrum. Arguing about playing before homework, whine about the rules. Crabby husband home from work, try to cook supper. Bath time even if you aren't ready, tantrum about washing hair. Bed time. No I said bed time. Go to bed BEDTIME. Please go to bed. Crash.

Anyone who says this is easy, has got to be on medication.

Really? Really?

2011-04-08T14:36:00.001-05:00

If you have ever seen SNL, you know the Weekend Update sketch, and the fabulous portion of it called "Really?!?" This is the JodyB version.

Congress cannot agree on a budget that was supposed to be nailed down back in October 2010. Really!?! Hey Congress: Out here in the real world, if you cannot complete assigned tasks, you lose your job pretty quickly... you must feel REALLY lucky!

Congress has decided that instead of coming to an agreement, they are just going to shut down the United States Government. Really!?! So instead of negotiating, they would rather just leave all "non-essential employees without a job during one of the worst job markets in American history. Really!?! How do you determine who is an essential employee Mr. President? My bet is that your name is a the top of the list!

EXCUSE ME? US Congress's inability to negotiate and copacetically agree on a BUDGET means that Military service men and women are not going to get their paychecks...or maybe half...yet Congress and the Prez are going to draw full pay? REALLY!?! I mean...REALLLLY!?!?!? You have REALLY got to be kidding me. US GOV'T, you just THOUGHT this country was in a heap of a mess with foreclosures and bad debt... Guess what happens if you fire all your "non-essential employees" and stop paying the rest... I will give you some time to think about that considering it is evident you cannot accomplish a complete intelligent thought...
............................................................
Did you figure it out? No. Why? Because your head is shoved so far up your ass that you have no idea what America REALLY looks like or who REAL Americans are. If I wasn't so goddamn patriotic, I'd be burning a picture of Congress on the White House Steps. You people REALLY are a bunch of idiots and bureaucratic assholes. Too bad we aren't parliamentary like Canada, and when you dildos can't agree on something-ANYTHING the whole lot of you get fired... You can bet your aligator shoes and your Armani suit that you WILL be out of a job come next election season though... any American who votes for you again is just as stupid as you are.

Don't draw your pay Mr. President... or I can bet you will be turning it over to a Republican in 2012.

disclaimer: I do not normally talk politics or blog about them for one reason: I know it is a sensitive subject for anyone with half a brain. However, I do not care if you are Green Party wheat grass muncher...we can all agree this is a load of crap.

SPAM

2011-04-05T20:14:00.000-05:00

No, not the canned meatish product, I am talking email.

It happens... give a new email address out once on a website or sign up for an email club somewhere and that is all it takes, hundred of SPAM emails get sent right to your inbox daily...

But, have you read some of the meant to be enticing yet hilarious subject lines in them lately?

Today, I got several that made me laugh.

Victoria's Secret: Get noticed, Gorgeous! Why THANK YOU Vicky! I knew someone would mention my obvious supermodel potential eventually! When do I get my wings? Can I wear the million dollar bra?

Lumineers: Get permanent beautiful white teeth TODAY! But..my teeth ARE white! Well, a nice decent shade of ecru maybe... wait, what are you trying to say? Didn't you see what Vicky said? I am gorgeous, except for my teeth I guess.

Hobby Lobby: Indulge your creative habit! Um, Hobby Lobby...who says it is a habit? I thought it was a skill? a beneficial trait? It is not like I am standing in the ribbon section smoking crack or sneaking into your paint department with a paper bag...
J C Penney: Home Sale! up to 60% off! The housing market has gotten so BAD that J C Penney is carrying houses now, up to 60% off!

Bath and Body Works: STOCK UP! Buy three, get three free! Darn. Now the B&BW folks are saying I stink! Mixed messages people, mixed messages!

J G Wentorth: Got a Structured Settlement? NO, I do not! However, all those lawsuits... since I pay my taxes and insurance premiums I think it IS MY MONEY, and I would like some right now please, if you can. Yes. Thank you. No..oh... what do you mean? OH... I need to get hit by a car. Let me work on that and I will get back to you.

Gold's Gym: Get a 7 day free VIP membership! I really appreciate it, but apprently you missed the memo! Vicky thinks I am hot.

So, in case you need a recap, I am GORGEOUS, but my teeth are ugly and off white. I huff paint at Hobby Lobby, and might be buying a house, for 40 cents on the dollar from JC Penney, but not before I mask my stanky odor with some B&BW stuff, get hit by a car so that JG Wentworth can take 60% of my settlement for giving me 40% up front and the gym... well... if there WAS a Gold's Gym anywhere near me, I would NOT be working out there, free or not!

What is your SPAM folder trying to tell you?

Photos... Because I like them

2011-04-03T21:34:00.000-05:00

I like these photos, so I thought I would share. Some are mine, others are courtesy of my sister in law Becca, whom I need to see a LOT more often that I already do. The editing is all me...and I think I am printing them for the wall!

Can you see it?

2011-04-02T11:28:00.000-05:00

If you cannot read it written all over their faces,
If you cannot hear it in their little laughs,
If you cannot smell in the newly budded flowers,
If you cannot see it the newly green grass,

If you cannot smell it in the gale force winds,
If you cannot tell from the constant sneezing,
If you cannot wait to turn the central air on,
If you cannot believe you are warm and then freezing,

Then let me spell it out for you,
for Spring has definitely Sprung.

Think Back...

2011-03-23T21:14:00.000-05:00

That is right... I want you to remember something, circa fifth grade. If you were like me, chances are good that one day you learned about a historical figure and someone in class chimed in and said "XXXXXX is my great great great great grandfather," and you felt small.

You felt small because you really did not know much about your ancestry, or had no rebuttal. You were not related to anyone of importance, or nobody could tell you you were at least, and it made you feel a little less cool.

I remember the day clearly. We had an extensive lesson that day, and there were plenty of historical people wrapped into that southern past to be related. William B. Travis, Robert E. Lee, heck...even Davy Crockett was brought up. I wasn't a true native southerner, and I knew very little about my ancestry anyhow...so I listened to kids gain a few more cool points with each connection. Friends became relatives in a strange, complex and twisted web of familial kin and I sat silently wishing that I knew just one prominent or well known name to attach to my own. I wanted to be cool, for having a cool relative, even if it was indirect and unconfirmed.

Today... Today I am FINALLY in the cool clique. Today, I can honestly and absolutely confirm that POCAHONTAS (Yes, THAT Pocahontas!!!!) is my Twelfth Great Grandmother. BOOO-YAHHH. John Smith? I call him Grandpa. Finally, thanks to my absolutely fantabulous geneaology gifted Aunt Chris I have an ancestral past worthy of bringing up to the masses!!!

Today, I am painting with all the colors of the wind (thanks Disney!) and excited as hell to be just a teensy weensy bit Native American.

With all good news comes a tiny bit of bad too though folks. Lizzie Borden, (yes, THAT hatchet murdering Elizabeth) happens to be a 7th cousin 4 times removed. We will just consider cousin Lizzie a black sheep though!

Arizona

2011-03-19T12:08:00.001-05:00

Spring Break for us meant a trip to Arizona. The majority of Karl's family resides there, and it was due time for a trip out.

We visited one of the coolest parks I have ever seen (Tumbleweed)

Where we were attacked by an ANCIENT daddy-monsterosaurus, JUST as we hatched from our egg.

We checked the mail,

and made new friends.

We bounced, and bounced and bounced some more,

and learned that there was no obstacle we could not conquer!

We spent time with family...

and had fun.

Spending time away from home really makes you appreciate your own domain however, and today is our first day home. The kids are relaxed, and so are the mommy and daddy. Rest, recuperation, and re-working our schedules to come!

This is...

2011-03-11T22:04:00.000-06:00

Hopefully not...

...but something tells me that it is.

Japan and Pacific Rim friends, you are on my mind. My prayers, thoughts and great worry and sympathy are with you. Keep your nuclear reactors sealed and your spirits high good folks.

Peek-a-Mooooo and a haircut!

2011-03-10T14:00:00.000-06:00

My baby girl had her first real haircut yesterday. She had a bang trim here and there before, but it was high time for a real all around cut to clean up her ends, and actually make it look like someone cares!

She was a VERY good girl, but it helps a lot that she "knows" the place as it is also where my mom and I get our hair done. That was the best bet for our shy little princess, and it worked like a charm. Even on a day when she had been roused from bed very early on accident, and had no nap, my girl sat good and got her hair did.

before

during

and a blow dry!

Way to go Anna-Banana!

For those who are following, the third calf finally got a name. She was incredible at getting lost (read: hiding from us) so Mom came up with Peek-a-Boo, and then my friend Jake said "what about Peek-a-Moooo!" and that was that!

The Three Amigos

from left to right Texas Valentine (or just "Texas") SuperBull 45 (or "Cheese") and Peek-a-Moo (I think I will call her "Peeky" though!)

There is another due any day now, and three more to come after that. If the next one is as white as the Three Amigos, Dad and I already have a name for it too!

We leave Sunday for Sunny Arizona Spring Break. I cannot wait too meet my one and only nephew, and have a blast with Karl's side of the family. I am sure there will be lots of stories to post too!

Updates...

2011-02-28T10:28:00.000-06:00

The first Spring thunderstorm decided to blow through at midnight last night. Super high wins woke me immediately, and I had trouble getting back to sleep after it had blown through. I am concerned about how I am going to handle this "tornado season" since last October 24th, one came as close to me as I ever want to be. Stay tuned for my impending panic regarding that type of weather in the future.

We are getting excited about spring Break vacation. The kids are both taking about plane rides and I hope that the four of us are able to travel without too much trouble, since it will be our first flight since Ryan was a little babe.

There should be several calves coming in the next couple weeks. One any day now, and then three or four more quickly after. I am excited to see if they ALL take after their sire and come out stark white like Cheese and Texas.

I have got a ton of errands to run today. Courthouse, post office, groceries, blah blah blah. I am BAD about procrastinating this type of stuff, and now I will have a whole day full of it. GRR.

I hope everyone is enjoying the little signs of spring that are cropping up all around us, and feeling well. I know we are appreciating a little warmth and green grass!

Letters and Emails

2011-02-24T08:19:00.002-06:00

This is my first email to my State Senator, Representative, Education Committee Chair and Governor Rick Perry.

The current plan for impending rape of the Texas Public School budget is unacceptable. I cringe when I imagine my young children sharing a classroom with 35 of their peers without funding for desks or materials. I worry that being already behind academically will turn into absolutely uneducated or unprepared for college or the workforce. No programs, fewer teachers, no money. How could that be acceptable to ANY Legislator regardless of the budgeting problems?

When every Senator and Representative returns his $7200 yearly salary and Rick Perry gives back his $115K, then and ONLY then should they even consider removing money from the school funds. When Texas voters approved the Texas Lottery, they were assured it would fund the schools. When constituents pay their property taxes to the school district they are assured it funds the schools. Tell me again why we pay State Sales Tax and petroleum taxes? Surely educating my children, THEIR future, is a priority of those who represent me at the Capitol!

Sincerely,
Jody Bentz

I plan to continue my singular campaign against this atrocity. Feel free to join me!

You can search for those who represent you via zipcode HERE.
Rick Perry may be contacted HERE.

Teachers

2011-02-24T07:10:00.001-06:00

Teachers have one of the most difficult, low paying jobs imaginable. There are some people who romanticize it, assuming it is an 8 to 3 job with lots of vacation in the Summer, but in reality it is much much more than that.

(thanks, Google Images)

Their early arrival on campus, followed by their morning duty. Anywhere from twenty to 150 kids in their classroom every single day for various amount of time. Lesson plans, grading papers, writing tests and entering grades sometimes into the wee hours of the morning. Out of pocket classroom expenses, even on their low salary. Bad kids, good kids, smart kids, and kids that need extra help. If all of that isn't enough to make you realize how valuable your local teachers are, think about this...
In 190 days time, it is their responsibility to teach your child everything they need to learn that year as set forth by the governmental guidelines, and if they fail just one of your children for any reason, their job is on the line.

So why then, is the State Of Texas (and states across the country) prepared to abandon their school system and teachers this coming year? Why does the fiscal planning include massive cuts in public education which is sure to lead to fewer teachers, more children per classroom, no book or material funding and the elimination of even more critical programs?

(Google, again)

Today, I say to the State Of Texas: KEEP public school funding. INCREASE public school funding, and make the cuts somewhere else. How can we raise and educate OUR FUTURE without the proper books and enough teachers to keep school from becoming a glorified babysitter? WE CANNOT! When the State Legislators have given up their $7,200 yearly state salary, and Rick Perry has given up his $115,000 a year...and all the other bureaucratic pocket padding is completely eliminated, if the state is still short on funds, THEN and only then should Schools suffer.

Readers, this is a scary scenario. We are not talking about cutbacks here. If the budget continues as planned, each district is set to layoff up to or more than 25% of their staff, new mandated programs in Science and History will go without books or materials and all extracurricular activities could be permanently canceled. For elementary children this will mean going to the "daycare" every morning, where they share a classroom with 35-45 peers and struggle through material as they share desks and books, and by the time they get to high school they will be so far behind academically that the standardize testing will have to be eliminated just so that they can graduate. For our older children, no sports means no athletic scholarships to college, and no special programs means no drop-out outreach, no dual credit and no programs to prepare them for college. Have you called your State Senator and Rep lately?

More Calf Baby

2011-02-15T16:46:00.000-06:00

Apparently the heifers think it is cool to have their babies on important dates! Cheese was born during the Super Bowl, and now, I am happy to introduce Texas Valentine, our second calf of the season, born in the night on...you guessed it... St. Valentine's Day. She is super pretty, stark white with red undertones, and red ears and nose...

and, for comparison... a new picture of Mr. Cheese, bothering his Momma.

2011-02-15T12:52:00.000-06:00

I am not a big fan of exploitation through pictures, especially when it is a photograph of a child in the hospital in pain... but I took this picture of my Annalee in the ER 8 days ago... and I keep looking at it. It is my little reminder to be more than thankful for the health and happiness of my family. To enjoy even the worst moments, and love with every ounce of myself.

The picture is powerful. She is resting, and no longer in any danger. Her fever was completely gone, and we were waiting for a load of test results to return. She is not in pain, but I was. I was just holding back a flood of tears, fear and hope. Tears for her, and tears for my own feelings of inadequacy and stupidity. Fear, because seriously... that was the scariest moment in my entire life. Hope for nothing to be wrong.

I got my wish. She is fine... but the picture in my brain haunts me as much as the digital image I took. My girl. One of my own babies on a hospital bed, and the unknown looming ahead. So... because this blog is an honest glimpse into our lives, I share it with you.

FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!

2011-02-12T15:15:00.000-06:00

My cold is gone(ish) and the bikes came out! Weather is gorgeous, and I do not care if my legs feel like jello right now we are lapping up the sunshine!

Ryan only rode with us until the end of the block, where he bailed. His friends were outside, and when given the choice between riding around with his mom or going to hang with the fellas... well APPARENTLY he is THAT old now. *tear*

If you are not experiencing bike weather today, come on down. We'd LOVE to see you!!!

Finally, some weather I can agree with!

2011-02-11T20:28:00.000-06:00

Today, after school it was an outdoor free for all. We all needed the fresh air, and we even brought a friend.

I cannot wait for tomorrow and Sunday, they are calling for 65 and 71 degrees... be still my heart!

2011-02-09T12:10:00.000-06:00

For everyone who has sent words of encouragement and love for Miss Annalee, she would like to tell you what she told the nurse at the ER two nights ago. "I ok, I done. Take this off and I go home!"

Today, we slide!

and oh my lord, don't look at that mess in the background... We play hard, and I am starting to feel a little under the weather myself.

I need to say a big fat public THANK YOU to my wonderful wonderful friend Keri who somehow managed to coordinate getting my family fed a WONDERFUL meal last night even though she lives about a bazillion miles away in Indiana (even thought I told her that she did not need to do it!!!) and my equally fabulous neighbor (and hospital transportation driver) for making me the most fabulous Paula Dean style homemade Chocolate Cream Pie with homemade meringue to make up for the birthday dinner that wasn't.

Love you. Love you. Love you. (and thanks to both for ruining our "diet" too :-)

Birthdays

2011-02-08T00:26:00.000-06:00

When you are 29, you worry about that impending 30th birthday, even if you are the most secure and optimistic person on the planet... It is the end of that final decade when people ask "how old are you?" and when you tell them twenty-something
they always respond with "you are soooo young."

I was not worried about my big day... the XXX of birthdays. The 30th year I have spend on this earth. I knew it was coming, I knew I would have to say "I am thi...thiiiii....thiiirrrrrrty" eventually and really, turning thirty felt a whole lot like 26, 27, 28, and 29...just another day.

Until 6pm. Annalee had been running a low grade fever with runny nose and light cough since the night before... and at 6pm she was due for Motrin. I could already feel her warming slightly so I poured the dose. She refused. I did not want to fight it. I asked her to take it several times, but anyone who has or has had a two year old knows...sometimes you just cannot squeeze blood out of a turnip and sometimes you cannot get your child to take their medicine.

The rest of the night is the only thing I will remember about my 30th birthday. It will be forever ingrained on my soul. I have seen my daughter seize. I have seen her eyes glaze over and roll to one side fixated on something nobody could see. I have held her with her back permanently arched, her mouth slightly open and her mind on standby. I have stripped clothes off her unresponsive body in hopes of cooling her down with water. I have panicked. I have called for help. I have sent my son running to the neighbor while I dialed 911.

I have seen a loving older brother call out to his sister and not understand what was happening. I have canceled an ambulance opting for a swifter ride in the neighbor's car. I have held a partially dressed baby in my arms as her body FINALLY relaxed and I checked her vitals, all while we traveled at illegal speeds toward a hospital. I have seen people NOT move out of the way of a flashing speeding car driving down a hospital route. I have cursed them to myself as I kept my forefinger on a pulse and my legs bouncing out of control with adrenaline and fear.

my jaw has chattered and my knees have been weak as I asked my daughter to wake up and speak to me. I have asked my driver to stop at the ambulance entrance, and literally strong armed my way into an Emergency Room while describing my needs to a nurse returning with her takeout lunch. I have given the evil eye to a PA who says "she needs triage first" as I walked my daughter into exam room 10. I have felt triumph when I heard her cry as the ice packs startled her awake and cooled her body. I have held her down for blood draw and swab, and inserted her into a pediatric chest xray torture device that looked like a contraption from the movie SAW, except for less rust and more clear plastic...

I have soothed her to sleep on a hospital bed and relished in her normal body temperature. I have waited for countless labs to return with no conclusive answers. I have allowed syringes and prescriptions and guarded them like gold as I carried my smiling daughter out of an Emergency Room, and walked the 1/2 mile my poor husband ran from the truck to the ER, because he couldn't figure out where it was.

I have experienced the most frightening night of my life, and I will not sleep tonight. I have syringes of acetaminophen and ibuprofen loaded on the night-stand and a schedule to keep. I will not witness that ever again.

So turning 30 is memorable... but in true JodyB style, never the way it was planned. Thank you to family and friends who drove a hundred miles and hour to be there with me for only a moment, and for others who have reached out from far with kindness and love. I am so lucky to have all of you in my life, and do not know how I would survive without you.

Super BULL XVL

2011-02-07T13:47:00.000-06:00

I've been waiting since the first of January... and the ladies were taking their sweet time. Yesterday, Dad called and said it was time (not just "watch time" but TIME-TIME, you know...like NOW!)

I busted my hump over to the farm, to watch a couple hours of pacing. Walking. Stopping. Contracting. Pacing. Walking. Contracting. We left her to it and went inside...the big game was coming on. Steelers vs. Packers.

Just as the Packers started dominating the first half... directly after the second Green Bay interception for touchdown....

Super Bull 45 was delivered. Now, that IS a fine name for a bucking bull prospect...but I think I will just call him Cheese.

Introducing, Super Bull 45, or Cheese for short.

CaBiN FeVeR

2011-02-05T10:33:00.000-06:00

I've got friends and family up north. Missouri, Indiana, Ohio and the lot...Heck, I have a friend in Alaska... and I am starting to worry about their sanity. It is 38 degrees according to my thermometer, but the snow remains. It is 38* and the highway near my home is still in bad shape. I cried last night when the forecaster said that we could be in for another blizzard, JUST LIKE this one...on Wednesday. Texans are not made for this kind of winter!

I just want to go to Walmart. I don't even like Walmart. As a matter of fact, I think Walmart is evil and hate having to go to Walmart... but right now at this minute, I WANT to go to Walmart.

I walked outside wearing nothing but my nightgown, and a pair of cowboy boots. I needed some freaking Vitamin D. The sun is extraordinarily bright (you know, because of the lovely white blanket!) and felt so warm. I wasn't even cold!

I am not interested in more snow days. My kids are not even interested anymore. The one thing we haven't done in this mess is ride around on the four wheelers, which is super fun but we haven't even been able to get over to the dang farm to get on them!

Now, as of late Annalee and I have turned into quite the homebodies. We hardly go to town, or anywhere except carpool lane to pick up Ryan, and the occasional grocery trip. We like being at home. This is incredibly different though. We are not here on our own accord...we are trapped.

If the temperature continues to rise, we are going to Evil-Mart. I am giving myself a goal of three o'clock. Walmart today by three o'clock. I even have an excuse...because if this weather keeps up we are going to be wiping our behinds with magazine pages, eating things we can shoot from the yard and entertaining each other with a raucous game of duct tape the children to the couch.

(I promise I don't duct tape children to anything...but it is a thought...)

Donuts

2011-02-04T10:30:00.000-06:00

We don't eat them often at all... but from now on, when we do...they will be homemade. This is a great project for the kids too! Have them cut the holes with a small round cutter (apple corer? juicer thingy?) while you control the hot oil and glaze!

"homemade" donuts in five minutes

1-can refrigerated biscuits (basic style, nothing fancy!)
brown sugar (1/2 cup-ish)
pat of butter
dash of water
cinnamon

Cut hole from center of biscuits (I used one of those orange juicer tools)
heat oil in fryer or dutch oven on stove (fry them, don't bake! fry them! You will thank me!)
Place brown sugar, pat of butter and just enough water to wet sugar in saucepan and begin to heat on medium. When sugar is melted and begins to turn to glaze, turn heat down to low and stir occasionally while you fry the donuts golden brown.
As donuts (and holes) come out of oil, sprinkle lightly with cinnamon.
Pour glaze over completed donuts, and enjoy warm with a tall glass of milk.

oh em gee.... you will never buy a donut again.

snow snow snow snow snow snow snow

2011-02-04T10:09:00.000-06:00

Meteorologist: Person given a degree at a university that qualifies them as a predictor of weather. alt. def. someone who guesses...but really has no clue.

They called for two to three inches of snow in our area for last night and today. We currently have six. I am not complaining... more IS better than less when we are talking about snow for kiddos to play in (and track into the house as the barrel in shedding layer after layer of snow duds in their path crying for hot chocolate and homemade donuts and cartoons on TV)

If you are fortunate enough to have warm snow free days, enjoy them. If you are sharing in the wonder that is topsy turvy weather week with me, have fun!

With all of the closures in the area, Casa Bentz is announcing that they will be open all day. Look for the frozen children in the front yard.

The waiting game...

2011-01-27T16:15:00.001-06:00

I might not be a Bradley Birthing Coach like my pal Lisa,
or a nurse in training like Nikki here... but I am on call for some super hefty pregnant ladies...and the waiting game has begun.

Like Lisa, I want to allow nature to take it's course and allow these girls to have their first babies all on their own with no intervention, but as Nikki will be trained...sometimes helping a girl out is the only option when we are talking about the baby birthing business.

So I wait. I watch. I have started checking on these ladies no less than once a day to see if any have progressed. I am not really sure what I will do if they do need help, since it is me and Annalee by ourselves in the middle of the day when they rest of our crew is at their day jobs... But we are anxiously anticipating the opportunity to share some adorable baby pictures with you...and I know you will love them!

For now though, let me introduce you to a few of the girls, and get you in on the expectation!

Good luck ladies. I will be watching, and waiting.

I hate...

2011-01-25T11:59:00.000-06:00

I hate not having anything to blog about. Blogging is like my therapy, and sharing all the crap in my head with you folks is cathartic in many ways. For several days though, I have been blank on subject matter. I know it must get extraordinarily annoying when the only thing I post is kid stuff, and I just haven't had any tangents to take you all on that made any sense.

For that I apologize, and give this excuse. The kids have been sick. It does not happen often at all, and I think that is why when it does happen, it is terrible.
We have been combining several homeopathic remedies, and I broke down and took them to the doctor too. Nothing serious, just the "crud" but I wish the crud would stay away!

What is this?

2011-01-18T12:11:00.000-06:00

Ladies and gentlemen, there is a big orangeish yellow orb peeking between the clouds in the sky. I cannot look directly at it, but it is radiating warmth and light and is painfully bright...I have seen it before many many times, but in the past few days I thought it had disappeared forever. Oh sunshine, where have you been?!?!

Rain is inevitable and usually needed.
Snow is fun for a day or two.
More rain on top of that is just torture.
Without sun, my mood is blue.

This is what it might look like, if I had a beautiful little bay window above my beautiful sink in my beautiful spotless beautiful white kitchen with it's beautiful yellow accents...

sadly though, this image is courtesy of Lifetime Leisure Rooms instead.

While I wax poetically at the return of the sun, I know there are those of you out there hoping it will shine brightly on you soon as well. For those of you up north remember...when your snow is finally melting, my air conditioner will probably be on. When you are picnicking in the park on a nice 60 degree day, I will be the one complaining about the hundred degree heat... You can rub that into my face when the time is right!

In the meantime, have a great January day and keep your eyes out for sunshine!

Yum!

2011-01-15T18:52:00.002-06:00

I am always very late in seeing "new" movies, and two nights ago was no exception. I finally watched Julie & Julia. I knew when I saw the preview that it could be a movie I would love, and it was. How could I not want to see the first non-SNL skit portrayal of Julia Child? How could I not want to learn about her and a blogger that I just might be able to identify with all at the same time?

I was hooked. As foodie movies go though, I spent the majority of the time being really hungry for the amazing foods I watched being cooked. Well, maybe not the aspic...but who likes aspic? Boiled and gelatinous calf leg juice? Sounds great right? No. I digress.

Julia Child. Such a wild woman. I love her. a lot, a lot. I want to cook like Julia Child, or even her 21st century admirer Julie...but first I need to earn enough Swagbucks to buy the book. Wait. The bible. The Julia Child bible.

Rest assured though readers, I will not start a 365 day 574 recipe blog fest when I do get it... I doubt my waistline needs any more help in the expansion department!

The first meal I saw Julie cook in the movie...that gorgeous bruschetta had me drooling. So, I knew Saturday night's meal would center around me, attempting to copy a character in a movie making a food that I hardly ever even think about, but which had my mouth watering for two days. Bruschetta. Toasted french bread, smothered in olive oil, and a tomato basil salad. HOW could I go wrong?

To add to the evening meal's charm, I went with a staple. Fettuccine Alfredo with grilled chicken. Karl's suggestion for the Alfredo kept the meal from being too much tomato, and I appreciated that!

So, here I am... thirty minutes after making and devouring my new favorite meal. My son said "mmmhhhmmmmhhmmmmmmm" and also "you should make this every day!" My husband had enough Alfredo in his beard for a snack later and Annalee came back for THIRDS. I am stuffed. Three pieces of olive oil smeared, tomato and basil covered toast will do that to you!

It is family movie night...which is usually accompanied by popcorn... but I have half a loaf of french bread left, and I might change the popcorn tradition to crostini... yum!

Bruschetta, dear dear bruschetta... see you again next week! You can bring Alfredo along, but really... it is fine if you come alone!

Jody's Bruschetta, which is really Julie's Bruschetta, as far as I can copy from the movie!
French bread, fresh sliced in 1/2" slices
Garlic
Roma or plum tomatoes
basil (fresh is best!)
EVOO

I slightly dried the bread in 200 degree oven to make it a little more sturdy because it was super fresh then
rubbed each piece of bread on both sides with a sliced garlic clove. I then basted them with olive oil (and I added a little garlic salt and dried basil to the bread!)

I blanched the tomatoes and then peeled them. Then chopped the tomatoes, added the basil and a little garlic and olive oil.

To finish it off, I put a bit of olive oil in a frying pan and fry-toasted the bread on the stove until very golden brown, and while still hot spooned the chilled tomato basil salad over the top. DEEEEEELISH!

Creeper. #1

2011-01-14T22:22:00.000-06:00

I am taking cues from my friends, and instead of hiding the blog email and comment creepers away in my email inbox... I am sharing them with you, WITH fancy commentary even! I would like to introduce you to Creeper #1, or "Anonymous" as he/she prefers to be identified as. I am the one in italics!

Men are the ones who create evil on Earth. It is the choices they make which enslave their souls to hell.
And that's why you are continually reincarnated. Welcome to the Matrix.

Yes Creeper. You are right. Sin was created by man/woman. I am pretty sure though, that is the last sane statement you made. Reincarnated? I thought you said we were enslaved to hell? Which is it? Am I burning for all eternity, or coming back? You MUST know for you have decided to share this information with me. Aww heck, give me the blue pill.

7 billion in 2011. Only 1 billion in 1800 and 2 billion in 1900.
Population explosion is a clue::::The gods are sending everyone back for The End.
There must be some purgatory-like place. Or individual. Like an animal.

Do you mean that we can completely blame a population increase on the "gods" and not the fact that health care, food distribution and life expectancy has improved? Are you asking me to explain purgatory to you? If so, first you need to stop watching Animal Planet.

Now the gods have sent everyone back to try for one final time to fix their problems and ascend into heaven. Avoiding an animal would have been a big positive because those thrust into this decayed enviornment have less of a chance than those who enjoyed the god's generosity of a slowly decaying enviornment with frightening clues, like the Depression, World at War, the Holocaust, etc.
Anything that can get the poeple frightened and praying is a good. thing. Contentment never motivated anyone.

what?

As we approach the Apocalypse the gods are removing "wrath of god" material from xtian dogma.
As we see wickedness spread throughout the country, like preditory behavior, godlessness, social changes, etc, using cable TV and the spread of "Californication" as justification, they changed xtianity, appropriatly with Catholicism first.
xtianity has changed radically in the 20th century, and everyone should be mindful of the way it was, because the people are in a process of slipping out of god's favor into a state of Damnation, from which the vast majority will never survive.
They used to scare people and make them too afraid to make mistakes. Now people aren't afraid of anything and don't think twice about doing something wicked and evil which will hurt their chances.

Why are you preaching to me, and then using the term xtian. Pretty sure that is Christian Aguilera right? Christian Aguilera is coming to judgment day? Pretty sure she is the first one that doesn't ascend.

Good god says a ceiling on time for everyone (see below). Evil god still gives hope for immortality to people who subscribed to preditory behavior:::Immortality if you are right versus a couple centuries partying at best even if you change now.
Due to institutional evil the closer we get to The End the more evil everyone incurrs (with individual variation due to behavior) which limits the time for everyone.
Probably the children who fix their problems and ascend into heaven as well. Experiencing the evil of modern life in the 20th century costed them, for which limits are placed. They are not the same as their innocent peasantry ancestors from the Old World.
OHHHH, so my peasant ancestors did not SIN. Just those of us in the big future. I see.

You people have fucked up bad by not getting out before the 20th century.

You people? What about you? You have a straight ticket? Am I missing something? Is this a direct message from Jesus? No? Are you dead? Grandpa, are you just trying to pull my leg? Come on, give yourself up! Who is this?

Just because the gods have to break some eggs doesn't mean they are evil. As management there are hard decisions that must be made. But they used this omelette and sold it to people as temptation, who went out and did things they shouldn't have done thinking being preditory was the way to "earn" their way into heaven.

omelette. I am SO glad you know how to spell omelet.

Employment charity:::Was W able to do his job as President?
I suspect there are many frat-boy types who couldn't or wouldn't study nor do the work necessary so they gained this "benefit" telepathically. This could have been extended to their professional life as well::In most of these cases they don't have what it takes to do their jobs. It is temptation which buys their confidence for life, ensuring no progress is made.

oh shit... W. Are you now referring to Mr President George W. Bush? OF COURSE you are! Of course he has telepathic powers! He is a frat boy. WTF are you TALKING ABOUT again?

I think employment charity is FAR more common than people may believe.
Another example how they tempted people in this manner is the procurement of sexual relations.
Keep raping these poor girls. You're going to end up as one in your next life.

one more time: WHAT?!?!?!?

Another feature which the Gods offer as a clue is very foreboading and ominous. Mt. Zion is a mountain to the north of Diablo (the eye of The Beast) and one which has a working quarry at its base. Consistant with the decay we experience in society, Mt. Zion is being eaten away, slowly stripped of its resources, until one day paradise will be gone forever.

Diablo? Don't you mean Israel? Pretty sure that area is called Israel.

If people only understood the importance of good parents. You won't be going anywhere without them. And it won't happen unless you are one first.

YES! Because this entire rhetoric was about parenting! huh? who? what? Creeper, thanks for the laughs!

Power Struggle

2011-01-13T16:19:00.000-06:00

I think six years old is by far old enough to pick up one's own toys, and clean one's own room. Trouble is, I have a whiner. He has been using the I can't or I need help excuses for ages, and today... today I am not accepting it.

Every now and then, he has been completely successful in this task...so I know he can. He doesn't mind vacuuming with the new child friendly stick vac... so what is the deal? It is a power struggle.

He wants to go play with his neighbor friend...he says he is going to DIE if I don't let him. I told him he could as soon as his room was clean. His time is running out.

Six years old is perfectly old enough to do your chores. Six years old is old enough to be expected to clean up after one's self. I am not giving in...

Today, there is a power struggle, and by gosh... I am going to WIN!

Annaleeisms

2011-01-11T09:36:00.000-06:00

Annalee loves to sing...and although it is always adorable, I cannot always guarantee that she will have the right words. Here are some examples of her remixed, rearranged tunes....

Roll Roll Rollll your boat, gently, geentleeeee, melly melly melly melly, life is but a meeeeeeee.

Tinkle Tinkle widdle starrr, how I wanda wut you arrrrreeeee uppabaaaaa the wood so fly, wike a dime in the skyyyyyyy.

Patty cake patty cake barkers mannnn, bake me cake fast you can, rolll it rolllll it, clap it, mark it with a beeeeeeeee, throw it in the oven for the baby and the mom and the Ryan and the dad.

Sometimes, I like her versions better than the originals!

It has begun...

2011-01-09T12:33:00.000-06:00

The snow that is. Its beautiful, the kids are beside themselves with excitement, and it is sticking on top of the flooding rains we had last night...but I am betting it will not compare to LAST YEAR....

Even if it doesn't turn out to be comparable to the 2010 Blizard, having this experience for my kids is amazing. It just doesn't do this in Texas...well it didn't used to!

Falling away from emotion.

2011-01-07T12:52:00.000-06:00

I have had a lot on my mind lately, some things good, some very bad. At the end of the day though, I think it is important for me to be able to detach myself from my emotions, observe things subjectively and move forward in the best way possible...

Right now for example, my daughter has a boo boo on her back. I feel bad for her, I am comforting her and as I hold her I am truly feeling her pain as any mother would for their child... but then I stepped back after doctoring her and reminded her that I had warned her not to climb on the furniture, that she would likely fall. I warned her, brought her down off the furniture twice and told her no several times.

Apparently this was a lesson she still needed to learn for herself though, because she climbed right back up onto the back of that LazyBoy, and promptly fell onto the window sill. By detaching myself from the Oh crap my baby just fell emotion...I can see clearly that by actually falling...she might not do it again. Or, if the past with these kids is any indication... we will have the same argument tomorrow.

I love these little daredevils.

Stuff Happens

2011-01-05T21:43:00.000-06:00

Unexplainable, heartbreaking and unimaginable stuff happens...and EVERY.SINGLE.TIME I am asking why. Why would God take a perfectly healthy baby at 13 days old, yet leave another child deathly ill to suffer? Why does God heal some and not the others? Why does God do anything that hurts some and pleases the rest. It cannot be because some were better believers than others. I cannot believe in a God like that.

A lesson? Maybe...but why? What lesson? What strength can one gain from constant heartbreak? What is that "God will never give you more than you can handle" stuff? What about "It is all part of His plan?" Sure we all learn to live with grief, to move on in one way or another...but when it is truly and undeniably unfair...when someone goes through nothing but pain and more heartbreak than imaginable... Is their lesson that suffering is all they deserve?

I am no where near perfect in my faith. I struggle daily with questioning my own spirituality. This is no secret. I wish I could be one of those people who can explain away all of this with "His plan..." but I cannot completely love a God like that.

2011-01-01T00:00:00.000-06:00

2011

Two Thousand Eleven? Twenty Eleven? Eleven? Two-oh-one-one? No matter what we are calling it, it is officially here. I made it to midnight, as did Karl and Ryan...but Annalee pooped out at about 9pm. Kiss kiss, smooch smooch...

Fresh, new, completely ambiguous and untarnished year...what will ye hold. I am anxious to see! So readers, answer me this...what are YOU looking forward to in your 2011?

2010-12-31T10:06:00.000-06:00

Well hello there dear readers... How have you been?

Daddy has been home on a vacation burn since Christmas Eve, and we have been busy rearranging furniture and purging old or broken toys in the process of moving ALL of the toy bins to the bedrooms. I cannot tell you how absolutely excited I am to have my living room back!

Since we are not fortunate to have a den area for a playroom, I have battled "toy hell" in my living room for six years now. We used an IKEA organization system built specifically for kid toys, but having them in the common space of the house was a pain. Today, I am proud to say that every single toy in is a bin with room to spare, and those IKEA bins are safely tucked against a wall in the kid's room. Hooray for mom reclaiming her house!

Christmas was, per usual, fantastic. The kids were more than excited by their gifts and I was happy to watch them celebrate the magic of Christmas. Ryan was gifted with a WII system that my brother no longer wanted, so his "big" gift was super affordable, and I had snagged a super great Black Friday deal on a Barbie Jeep for Annalee...

Santa provided a couple of Pillow Pets and a tent and tunnel play-thing which had them smiling from ear to ear...and Ryan was flabbergasted that Santa and maybe some elves were in our house long enough that night to remove Mom's cruddy kitchen faucet and replace it with the fanciest one she has ever owned!

Hooray for the magic of Christmas.

Today marks the last of 2010. The end of a year that has been filled with tragedy in our community and county, financial strain for our family, and a few life changing milestones too. It hasn't been all bad as we are all happy, healthy and have the things that we need...but I am really looking forward to a 2011 filled with less drama, no tragedy, and a whole lot of peace and quiet. I do not think that it is too much to ask for, and I wish the same for ALL of you.

HAPPY HAPPY NEW YEAR

to all of my best people (THAT IS YOU!)

Have a GREAT day JodyB friends!

2010-12-25T09:14:00.001-06:00

NickJr and bad behavior

2010-12-23T09:55:00.000-06:00

Two little helper type elfish creatures find out that a friend put a package in the mail drop box, but had forgotten to put stamps on it. What else would those helper type elfish friends do then, but break into the post office, slip into the mail room through the slot and seek out the package so that they can put stamps on it before it gets sorted into the "do not deliver" basket...

I am not so sure even NickJr is offering anything wholesome these days.

Dropping Caffeine?

2010-12-21T18:43:00.000-06:00

Caffeine makes my world go around. This I have learned over the past couple of days. I did not buy my weekly case of Dr Pepper during our grocery shopping because I am mad about the price increase. A couple of months ago it was $4.98, and it slowly crept up to $6.98 a case. This angers me a lot.

So, I bought a 2 liter which quickly ran dry and decided to try a couple of caffeine free days. I am slowly falling asleep as I type this... no lie. Caffeine is my gasoline, and without it my carburetor is clanking, my windshield is foggy, and my in dash computer is failing...I could make some tea but I do not know if I have enough energy, and it makes me extra awake and have to use the bathroom a lot. Not something I want to concede to at 7pm!

So, I am caffeine free, and I hate it.

2010-12-20T18:15:00.000-06:00

I have mentioned many times, of life's little lessons and how I learn something new every day. Sometimes my new knowledge is beneficial and good, and other times it is sad little realizations about the world or someone around me. This month's installment is a little of both.

I learned that there are some people out there who will attack someone else for doing something good. Evil comes in all types.

I learned that my kids are helpful and obedient if approached in the right way.

I learned that my husband is still not very helpful or obedient. (that is a joke. ok, not really.)

I learned that I cannot keep up the house with two kids. I just cannot. I refuse to spend every waking hour cleaning something. Sorry. Be disgusted if you want.

I learned that I need foodstamps. Not that I actually qualify for them, or would get them...but the biggest expense in our household other than the mortgage is groceries, and it is beating me down one trip at a time.

I learned that I love my two closest neighbors (not really a new thought per se) but that I really dislike one of the offspring belonging to each of them...

I learned that the two offspring aforementioned, might be bipolar.

I learned that my daughter has graduated from riding in the stroller to walk to the mail boxes to pushing her doll stroller with HER baby to the mailboxes (and being Momma's helper by pushing the mail back too!)

I learned that Dora goes to a pyramid pretty often, and that Slippery Sand Traps are terrible..for little brown bi-lingual gals and their monkey friends.

I also learned that although Moono resembles a big red bumpy adult toy, he is a pretty cool role model for children.

Finally, I learned that the Christmas Spirit is not always a good thing. Getting into the Christmas Spirit can mean turning into rude, obnoxious cranky people to some... and Jody don't like that.

So tell me, what have YOU learned this month?

Music and my soul...

2010-12-19T20:54:00.000-06:00

I love music. More specifically, I really like to sing along to good music. Unfortunately though, I am pretty sure I sound more like a cat being brutally slaughtered or a little howler monkey who lost his momma than a talented cover artist when I do sing along, and I do it a whole lot.

Karl used to get mad. "just be quiet and listen!" he would say... but I just cannot. I feel the music in my soul, and I need to sing. I must sing along to my music. most music. all music. Every now and then Karl still makes a snide comment, or four. I continue to sing.

Recently though, some other folks have been taking notice... and not in a super great participatory or celebratory way. My children have asked me to stop singing. My children have YELLED AT ME to "STOP IT MOM!" My kids think I suck too, and that sucks.

So, I will sing a song to them, attempting to envelop them in my musical taste, and provide them the fundamental experiences of my love for music. Oldies, Classic Rock, Rock and Roll, Pop, Country... and they look me straight in the eyes and say "Mom, turn the radio off."

But I keep singing, and they get mad. Rock on party people, and I better hear you singing along. If I can't make my kids love it, at least maybe you do.

Fritatta

2010-12-16T16:38:00.000-06:00

I experimented with some leftover pasta today, and besides the first degree burn I sustained to my hand it, was a success!

I had read some time ago on my favorite (now defunct) Bento blog about pasta fritatta. Call it what you may (quiche sans crust, souffle' sans uppity french dude) but basically... we are talking leftover pasta with sauce omelet pie.

I took about a cup or a cup and a half of picollini in a tomato based sauce, and warmed it on the stove top in a small (non-stick oven safe) skillet. Meanwhile, I took three eggs, and beat them vigorously with a splash of milk, until frothy.

When the pasta was warm, I poured the egg over the top and used my spoon to make sure everything was cohesive, and then I transferred it to a 350* degree oven.

I watched it closely, because there was no recipe to tell me how long it would take...and when it looked like the eggs were cooked through I removed it from the oven and let it cool a bit before inverting it onto a plate.

I ate some right away to see how yummy it was hot...and it WAS yummilicious. the blog I got the idea from also mentioned it is fab cold...so I will test that at a later time...
but for now...

A terrible picture of a half Pasta Fritatta!